If you had a month to live what would you do?

[cozener]

And continuing my chain of far fetched threads here's another. You go see your doctor and he tells you that you have an inoperable brain tumor (or something). You have about a month left of quality life left to you. When I say that I mean that you have a month before the cancer starts to effect motor skills and mental faculties and its pretty much a fast track to death after that.

How would you want to spend your last month?

If I could, I think I'd spend every moment I could with my boys and I'd do every little thing I could think of to make sure that their memories of me are good ones. I'd probably make a few videos of myself so that they'd have something to remember me buy...kinda like what Michael Keaton did in My Life. He found out he was dying so he made a bunch of videos of himself giving advice to his unborn son. I would also make sure that my mother and father, brother and sister all know that I do, actually, love them.

Oh and of course I'd arrange to have sex with two women at the same time before the month was out.

[Matt]

I'd quit my job, live on my savings and spend every single moment with the people I care about. Starting with Dora and moving out from there.

[Ves'Ka Gan]

Oh man...I would definitely spend as much time with my beau and my family as possible--speciically my younger brother. If any kind means the world to me it is that kid (assuming I don't have children of my own when this happens).

I would also probably work my ass off to finish my novel. I have enough unfinished works, and I would hate that to be my legacy.

And I'd eat A LOT of rich, fattening foods. Who cares if you put on ten or twenty lbs at that point?

[Jean]

I would go to one of the European cities I love, and spend that month there, alone. Some animals have to die alone.

[Ves'Ka Gan]

I suppose we would all respect your wishes, Jean, but that would be one sad month for al the bear lovers in your life!

[cozener]

I would go to one of the European cities I love, and spend that month there, alone. Some animals have to die alone.

Wow. I did not see that answer coming.

[Jean]

well, I think one week could be reserved for a big international partying

on closer consideration:

1. five days Big partying in Prague or Venice
2. five days with my closest friends in London or Paris
3. five days with my wife in St.Petersburg
4. two weeks alone in Paris or London (the "some animals die alone" part has to remain)

that is, I would dedicate the whole month to goodbyes only - to my loved one or myself - to preparing for a calm, decent death. No finishing any unfinished business, no fuss in any way.

[Daghain]

Me either!

I would quit my job and travel with DBF.

[cozener]

So, who is this David Brian Finklestein guy you keep referring too?

[Daghain]

DBF = Dear Boyfriend.

[Brice]

well, I think one week could be reserved for a big international partying

on closer consideration:

1. five days Big partying in Prague or Venice
2. five days with my closest friends in London or Paris
3. five days with my wife in St.Petersburg
4. two weeks alone in Paris or London (the "some animals die alone" part has to remain)

that is, I would dedicate the whole month to goodbyes only - to my loved one or myself - to preparing for a calm, decent death. No finishing any unfinished business, no fuss in any way.

I don't see the USA on that list.

[cozener]

Neither was Kazakstan

[Brice]

I'd probably self destruct. I'd do nearly every reckless thing that came to mind.

[Jean]

I don't see the USA on that list.

see Item One. You will have to come to Prague (or Venice), and bring the rest of the crew along.

[Daghain]

We would totally scrape up the cash for that.

[Brice]

Ok!

[Letti]

And would you tell it to your loved ones?

[cozener]

Oh...good question.

In a way I'd want to because I feel that they should know. I wouldn't want them saying or doing something that they might regret. I mean, it might eat at them if one of them said something harmful to me right before I died. In that vein, they may have some things that they'd like address with me before I died and I wouldn't want to deny them that.

But, by the same token, I wouldn't want them fawning over me all month long, worrying, hurting, feeling like they have to act a certain way around me, etc.

I'll have to think on this one.

[Brice]

I think I wouldn't tell them. It doesn't seem right to me to know someone you love is dying. To me it seems better to just enjoy what life you have and act as if you never knew. You would have to live with knowing...there is no reason why they should have to do so.

[theBeamisHome]

i would tell my loved ones so they'd have time to prepare... wouldn't want them to find out later that i knew the whole time and left them suddenly..

as for what i would do... spend time with my loved ones until it was time for me to go... then i think i'd do as Jean... maybe not though... i'm torn.. because i want my closest to be with me until the end... but i feel like that can be a lil selfish and i don't want anyone to have to suffer through seeing me suffer. i also wouldn't want to be a burden. i also would make sure that no one had to deal with my crazy bills lol

[Matt]

I've always believed that love is the only thing you can take with you. When all the trappings of life are stripped away and you are laying on the edge of the clearing, it will only be the love of your people that you can take to the other side.

That is also why I think loving someone (truly) is the meaning of life.

[cozener]

I think I would tell them. They should have the chance to settle any unresolved issues, say what they need to say, etc. I think that at least a few of my family and friends would resent not being given the chance to do this, knowing that I knew that I was dying.

From my perspective, it seems like my reasons for not telling them are a little selfish...because I don't want to be made uncomfortable by their grief.

[jayson]

Like many have answered, I would spend as much time with my family as possible, especially Ella.

DBF = Dear Boyfriend.

I always read DBF as "Daghain's Boyfriend"

[CPU]

I tend to think about this question a lot. Not that I'm particularly morbid (well, ok , I AM), but given my health, death in general is something I tend to think about frequently. I'd spend a good portion of that last month making sure I actually had everything setup to ensure that my wife would be taken care of.

I'm not sure I'd want to tell her though, although if she found out later that I'd known all along she might misinterpret why I didn't let her know. If I did tell her, she'd be the only one I'd let know. It's my plan not to have a funeral, or a wake, or any of that other stuff when I go. Nail the box shut and put me in the ground before anyone even knows.

[Ves'Ka Gan]

I don't think I would tell them...in the original post, you said we would have one month of "quality" life left, so it's not as though on day 31 I was going to drop dead. I think that once the sickness takes hold and it is obvious, I would tell them all and we would have time for those final goodbyes, unresolved issues, and so forth.

I would take that month of quality left to enjoy that time with those I love, and hopefully resolve some issues along the way, without the weight of impending death looming over every moment. I would want the people I cared about to be able to enjoy those final good moments with me to their fullest. There will be time for weeping and feeling sorry for me later.