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Thread: singing her to sleep

  1. #1
    Gunslinger Apprentice woodpryan is on a distinguished road woodpryan's Avatar

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    Mar 2010
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    Huntsville, Alabama, United States
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    Default singing her to sleep

    Singing her to sleep
    She was mine and mine alone
    It was in these eyes that her beauty shone
    The nights I sang to her until she slept
    The same as when I calmed her as she wept

    Her head upon my shoulder
    And her body light and slender
    Are the things I keep remembered
    As I lie alone attempting to forget her

    He came to her unburdened
    By hopes or dreams; a life uncertain
    But in the way of personality
    He must have something over me

    Prospects of a life divine
    She shared her dreams with mine
    A life of beauty and relief
    In shambles – I watch with disbelief

    She has been misled
    Into thinking I am dead
    No longer worth the wait
    Her life in pieces now too late

    Never have I felt this way
    About someone met upon my way
    I don’t like the feeling of hate
    That burns in my chest while I’m irate

    Never have I wished eternal sleep
    For a man I met upon the street
    But now as my world tumbles down
    I hope for grim to come around

    And I never have believed
    That heaven was more than seed
    From our senseless fear of death
    Or that Satan had a breath

    But if these things I did hold true
    It is brimstone I would wish unto
    The man that stole my life
    And the one to be my wife

    Yet does it not take two
    To make such nightmares true
    And to her I cannot say
    That I wish for disarray

    I wish upon her house and child
    A man who will make her smile
    Who will sing her down to sleep
    And calm her in her need to weep
    Go then, there are other worlds than these.

  2. #2
    Gunslinger Apprentice woodpryan is on a distinguished road woodpryan's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Huntsville, Alabama, United States
    Posts
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    Default

    I didn't get any feedback for this here, but I realized on my own what was wrong with this poem and have made several revisions since I last posted this. I know mama said not to say anything at all if one didn't have anything nice to say, so hopefully, now that it's been revised and is in it's final draft, a person or two may have something to say. Of course I disagree with mama when it comes to writing. If you like it or dislike it, feel free to comment. Thanks for taking the time to read it.


    She was mine and mine alone.
    It was in these eyes her beauty shone.
    I sang to her until she slept,
    just as when I calmed her as she wept.

    Her head upon my shoulder
    and her body, light and slender
    are what I keep remembered
    as I am trying to forget her.

    He came to her unburdened
    by hopes or dreams; a life uncertain.
    But for personality,
    he must have something over me

    Prospects of a life divine;
    she shared all her precious dreams with mine.
    Her life of ease and relief
    in shambles – I watch with disbelief.

    Somehow she has been misled
    into thinking that I am now dead,
    that I am not worth the wait.
    Her life is in pieces now; too late.

    Never have I felt this way
    About someone met upon my way.
    I despise all of this hate
    that burns in my chest when I’m irate.

    Never wished eternal sleep
    for a man I met upon the street,
    but as my world tumbles down
    I wish the reaper would come around.

    And I never have believed
    that heaven was more than just a seed
    from our senseless fear of death
    or that Satan ever had a breath.

    But if these things I held true
    it is brimstone I would wish unto
    he, who stole from me my life
    and the one who was to be my wife.

    And yet, does it not take two
    to make these atrocious nightmares true?
    And to her I cannot say
    That I wish for any disarray,

    rather a house, a child,
    a man she loves, who makes her smile,
    who will sing her down to sleep,
    and calm her in her need to weep.
    Go then, there are other worlds than these.

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