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An ugly cat. Some of the ugliest cats I've ever seen still get pampered like royalty. Plus female cats don't seem too picky when it comes to looks.

Would you rather be homeless for a week or read...

I would prefer barefoot. I've got big hobbit feet that can take some punishment. And it would be regular TV only, you couldn't tune to those channels that just play music.

Would you rather never...

Definitely starve. I was actually bitten by a rat once (a lab rat, not a sewer rat) and that one time was one time too many.

Would you rather never watch television again or never listen to music...

Stuck in an elevator. At least you'd be able to move around a bit. Being pinned in a rollercoaster seat indefinitely would be tortuous.

Would you rather go blind or go to prison for 5 years?