That was false advertising!
Shot the sheriff.
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That was false advertising!
Shot the sheriff.
But not the deputy; I just stabbed him.
Covers their slip'n'slide with industrial strength adhesive.
For long lasting (although somewhat sticky) fun!
Punched Tyson in the face.
Then he punched through my face.
Always draws a Hitler mustache on people who fall asleep on flights to Germany.
They really loved the little Asian man I got last time.
Enjoys a nice, rousing night of karaoke - in the middle of a funeral.
It doesn't go over well - especially when I sing "I love the dead" by Alice Cooper.
Can cross their eyelids.
But it destroys nintey brain cells everytime I do it.
Currently hunts platypus for living.
All I ever find is ducks and beavers, though.
Thought "Puss in boots" referred to boots full of ooze from wounds.
Seriously? Who wants to read a story about a cat anyway?
Still quotes Urkel from Family Matters and thinks it is cool.
Did I do that? :cool:
Makes very sexually suggestive remarks in every sentence without realizing it.
Your really driving the point home.
Still rewards people with gold star stickers.
I'm sure it means much more to them than a purple hearrt.
Was afraid of lucky charms after seeing the movie "Leprechaun"
I figured if I ate his cereal, he'd have to make more movies to pay for more cereal. I wouldn't dare torture the world in that way.
Takes daily plane rides in hopes they will be marooned on the Amazon Island.
leaving, on a jet plane .. :)
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Likes to put their hands and feet in the freezer.
I can never quite get the door closed, though.
Shouts "Behold, the power of cheese!" and throws scalding fondu cheese in complete strangers' faces.
I find the scalded and blistered skin adds a nice zest to the cheese itself.
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Loves having itchy eyeballs.
Its a feeling you just can't imagine until you've experienced it.
Always thought that the term "behind bars" was referring to candy bars, so they comitted crime to get behind bars.
And then _I_ was the candy :( :(
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Preferrs supositories.
It can get pretty messy when I try to get 2 spoonfuls of Pepto Bismo in.
Won't eat sponge cake unless they're sure it works well as a sponge.
Otherwise, what's the point?
Can't sleep at night with Mr. Teddy
He makes me feel dirty.
In addition to their nightlight, owns a "daydark".
It is a large, flat board I use to blot out the sun.
Can sleep only if they have their bunny suit on.
Its warm and snuggly.
Keeps a huge cactus stuffed in their pants at all times.
Only so I can pull the joke. "Prepare for a huge prick!"
Can only write with their feet.
I guess that's what happens when I accidentally nail both hands to my face.
Egged a chicken.