Significant other's response to collecting?

[inertia1215]

My finance and I just came home to a package on my doorstep from SubPress. When she asked what it was, I told her my signed copy of Heart Shaped Box.

She quickly replied, don't you already have that book? And I said yea 4 copies.

Now I know a lot of other collectors out there are like me, and this sparked a very interesting discussion between us and I was wondering how all of you deal with it?

I tell her as much as I can as to why I have a US 1st, a UK 1st, a US signed etc...., but I can only explain what I have and why, not why I do it?? Other than, "i'm a collector, I like them."

To that response I usually get, we can go out for $100, rather than look at a book on a shelf! It is not a financial concern of what I am spending, she just does not understand why??

Feedback?

ps. sorry if there is a thread out there for this, did a quick search, couldn't find one!

[Rusher]

Its funny to read this today, because my husband and I just had this conversation last night. Although financial concerns are definitely a problem of mine ( you should see the collection I have when I'm asleep...lol ) I still have a fairly decent collection and I'm always scouring to find deals to make money to buy more for my collection.

My husband doesn't understand this AT ALL. However, he has his own passion and hobby and that is RC helicopters. Those stupid things easily go for around the 1000 to 1500 dollar range ( the ones he flies anyway ) and when they crash, which they inevitably do, even if you just break blades...thats at least 80 for a new pair.

I think everyone has their own passions and loves when it comes to collecting things, and may not understand someone else's love for something but certainly understand their own.

Maybe your fiancee likes clothes, or shoes or handbags ??? Does she have to have the 100 dollar jeans while your fine with Lees or Wrangers..lol, does she have to have those 100 dollar shoes or that 2 or 3 hundred dollar Coach purse ? Same thing. People are just willing to spend money on things they love....So unless you happen to be with someone who has the same passions that you do, I think those discussions about "why" will always be there.

[wizardsrainbow]

I think people either understand the Collector's mentality, or OCD as it were, or they just don't get it, and all the explaining in the world isn't going to do any good. My wife is like that. She understands that collecting, finding a rare or needed item makes me happy, but there is no way that she can experience the emotion that I feel. Because she loves me, she will listen to my stories, and is happy that I am happy, but there is no way (even with her growing knowledge of what makes my collection tick) that she will ever say, Holy smokes, that is kick-ass!

Still, she understands enough to go behind my back, make a deal with the preeminent King collector in the world, and present me with a rare King collectible on Christmas that literally made my jaw drop and rendered me incoherent for 2 minutes! That's the best I can hope for, and I am very happy to live with that!

[turtlex]

Wiz - I think you hit it on the head perfectly.... for a dedicated collector... there's EMOTION attached to a find. That's the difference.... and really, how can you explain to someone how you respond emotionally to a book or comic or poster or promo item?!?

My girl gets that collecting is important and good, for me, but really doesn't have the collector-gene herself. She loves the Dark Tower books and series, but is just as happy with a used paperback as she would be with a signed first edition. Go figure!

I consider myself very lucky though, because while she doesn't "get it" herself, she understands how important it is to me... to the point of even running around Maine during our vacation to visit Betts Books, and stop into every small and large used bookstore looking for Dark Tower books. Now that, is cool.

[inertia1215]

Thanks for the responses guys. and Wiz, yes, it is the emotional aspect of it that she will never understand.

Its nice to know there are others out there who have this same struggle.

Rusher - Its hard b/c believe it or not, she does not have anything like that! she was always raised with very little money she never created the desire to have any "nice, un-necessary" things.

she has come a long way with treating herself every once in a while, but believe it or not, I usually have to force her to spend some money on herself!!!

[Matt]

I'm in the same boat Pam, your description totally reminds me of Dora.

She loves it because it makes me happy and actually ran all around Washington DC with me while we waited until late to see King. :wub:

[turtlex]

Matt - We are both very lucky then. :grouphug:

[blg]

I think people either understand the Collector's mentality, or OCD as it were, or they just don't get it, and all the explaining in the world isn't going to do any good. My wife is like that. She understands that collecting, finding a rare or needed item makes me happy, but there is no way that she can experience the emotion that I feel. Because she loves me, she will listen to my stories, and is happy that I am happy, but there is no way (even with her growing knowledge of what makes my collection tick) that she will ever say, Holy smokes, that is kick-ass!


I couldn't have said this any better. It's pretty much a mirror image of exchanges between my wife and myself.

[e_taylor]

I'd have to agree with David and Bill too - far from understanding, theres more so a loving acceptance from my girlfriend. And so long as rent gets paid and we have food to eat.... its all good!

[Gris]

I ask the wife for permission to spend money, she says "Sure", then asks why I spend so much money on books when they show up and yells at me not to buy anymore.

Then I ask her a week later for something else and she says "Sure"

[The Lady of Shadows]

since my husband's ocd collecting has gone from star wars collectibles to collectible model cars to real, life size cars (he currently has three mustangs - a gt, a mach one, and a bullitt) i better not hear a damn thing but "sure dear" when i ask for the rare expensive item. :lol:

actually, he was all for me getting the signed bag of bones. he knows how important the book is to me, and how excited i was about adding a signed item to my collection. but he really doesn't understand the need for different editions of the same book. so i just point to the many variations of the same car. works every time. :P

[jhanic]

I don't ask my wife how much she spends on clothes and she doesn't ask how much I spend on books. Works like a charm!

John

[Chooch]

Its funny to read this today, because my husband and I just had this conversation last night. Although financial concerns are definitely a problem of mine ( you should see the collection I have when I'm asleep...lol ) I still have a fairly decent collection and I'm always scouring to find deals to make money to buy more for my collection.

My husband doesn't understand this AT ALL. However, he has his own passion and hobby and that is RC helicopters. Those stupid things easily go for around the 1000 to 1500 dollar range ( the ones he flies anyway ) and when they crash, which they inevitably do, even if you just break blades...thats at least 80 for a new pair.

I think everyone has their own passions and loves when it comes to collecting things, and may not understand someone else's love for something but certainly understand their own.

Maybe your fiancee likes clothes, or shoes or handbags ??? Does she have to have the 100 dollar jeans while your fine with Lees or Wrangers..lol, does she have to have those 100 dollar shoes or that 2 or 3 hundred dollar Coach purse ? Same thing. People are just willing to spend money on things they love....So unless you happen to be with someone who has the same passions that you do, I think those discussions about "why" will always be there.

Hey I fly RC Helis also and you are right those damn things cost a bundle and of coure you crash and spend even more !!! I dont know how my wife puts up with me but as we both say " Life is too short - Money isnt everthing" but when it comes to SK its more then a hobby, its a passion to hold something in your hands that no one else (other than other collectors) have or would ever understand. I also look at it as a long term investment (its doing better than my 401k) and its tangable, if I had to I could liquidate easly.

[e_taylor]

Its funny to read this today, because my husband and I just had this conversation last night. Although financial concerns are definitely a problem of mine ( you should see the collection I have when I'm asleep...lol ) I still have a fairly decent collection and I'm always scouring to find deals to make money to buy more for my collection.

My husband doesn't understand this AT ALL. However, he has his own passion and hobby and that is RC helicopters. Those stupid things easily go for around the 1000 to 1500 dollar range ( the ones he flies anyway ) and when they crash, which they inevitably do, even if you just break blades...thats at least 80 for a new pair.

I think everyone has their own passions and loves when it comes to collecting things, and may not understand someone else's love for something but certainly understand their own.

Maybe your fiancee likes clothes, or shoes or handbags ??? Does she have to have the 100 dollar jeans while your fine with Lees or Wrangers..lol, does she have to have those 100 dollar shoes or that 2 or 3 hundred dollar Coach purse ? Same thing. People are just willing to spend money on things they love....So unless you happen to be with someone who has the same passions that you do, I think those discussions about "why" will always be there.

Hey I fly RC Helis also and you are right those damn things cost a bundle and of coure you crash and spend even more !!! I dont know how my wife puts up with me but as we both say " Life is too short - Money isnt everthing" but when it comes to SK its more then a hobby, its a passion to hold something in your hands that no one else (other than other collectors) have or would ever understand. I also look at it as a long term investment (its doing better than my 401k) and its tangable, if I had to I could liquidate easly.

Thats how I look at it too! Not that I'd ever sell my collection, and my goal isn't to flip it for a profit, but if worse came to worst, its a back up plan.

[Gunkslinger]

I don't ask my wife how much she spends on clothes and she doesn't ask how much I spend on books. Works like a charm!

John

I'm with you John, if she starts inquiring about me buying books or art, I just walk into her closet and take a look around.

[jhanic]

My wife has EVERY closet in our home filled with her clothes--and lots of "opposite season" clothes packed away in boxes. She grew up with very little and discovered that she liked new clothes. I don't begrudge her any of them. Of course, it helped that she worked part-time in a women's dress shop for a long time--lots of discounts!

John

[Girlystevedave]

My husband doesn't read, but luckily, he understands my ocd tendencies when it comes to collecting books. It was actually his idea for me to get 2 copies of every DT comic I purchased. That way I have one to read, and one put away for safekeeping. :)

[tippy4]

My wife tolerates my collecting...barely.

Like you and your Heart Shaped Box, I have many titles that I have several copies of. Take Dark Tower 5 for example. I have a trade edition for reading, a trade edition still sealed in shrinkwrap from Grant, a trade edtition signed by Bernie Wrightson, a trade edition signed by Stephen King, an artist edition, and a signed/limited edition. That is six copies of the same title.

Unfortunatley, unlike the spouses and significant others mentioed above, mine does not have a hobby that requires money. She is not a clothes-fiend, does not fly RC helicopters, nor does she buy and restore classic cars.

That being the case, when a box shows up on my doorstep, and she is giving me a hard time about it (as she does each and every time), I cannot say to her..."Oh yeah? Well, what about all the money you spend on X?"

But, she loves me and understands that this is my "thing" and that it makes me happy....so she puts up with it....for now. :beat:

[inertia1215]

My wife tolerates my collecting...barely.

Like you and your Heart Shaped Box, I have many titles that I have several copies of. Take Dark Tower 5 for example. I have a trade edition for reading, a trade edition still sealed in shrinkwrap from Grant, a trade edtition signed by Bernie Wrightson, a trade edition signed by Stephen King, an artist edition, and a signed/limited edition. That is six copies of the same title.

Unfortunatley, unlike the spouses and significant others mentioed above, mine does not have a hobby that requires money. She is not a clothes-fiend, does not fly RC helicopters, nor does she buy and restore classic cars.

That being the case, when a box shows up on my doorstep, and she is giving me a hard time about it (as she does each and every time), I cannot say to her..."Oh yeah? Well, what about all the money you spend on X?"

But, she loves me and understand that this is my "thing" and that it makes me happy....so she puts up with it....for now. :beat:

Tippy, my girl read this, and said "exactly!!!!!!!"

She has said many times, its only because it makes me happy that she tolerates it.for now. and thats good enough for me. for now.

[Patrick]

It's possible that tippy's wife and mine are long lost soul sisters.

[flaggwalkstheline]

the female I'm currently in a relationship with is just as much a nerd as me:nana: so its all cool

[Pasiuk57]

My wife understands the collector mentality. I have a separate checking account for buying and selling books. I only use that money for books so it never comes out of "our" money. My wife has a separate checking account too(we both work!) and she can buy 100 pair of shoes with her money and I'm fine with it. It works like a charm! We never argue about money. I was advised by a friend of mine to do this years ago and no problems since then! BUT, she is really easy going loving woman! I am very lucky as a few people know just how much King and other stuff I own, I am lucky!

[NeedfulKings]

My wife (BedOfRoses here) is a collector like I am, so we're good. In fact, she may spend more than I do, although several of those purchases were FOR me. As I have several copies of the same titles, she does the same with the authors she collects.

In the end, I have far more books that she does, but my authors are more prolific. And she's a huge King fan, so that collection is basically "ours."

[Fsmdr]

My wife (BedOfRoses here) is a collector like I am, so we're good. In fact, she may spend more than I do, although several of those purchases were FOR me. As I have several copies of the same titles, she does the same with the authors she collects.

In the end, I have far more books that she does, but my authors are more prolific. And she's a huge King fan, so that collection is basically "ours."

I think I am actually lucky my husband does not collect what I do, else there will be no money left for food!. :wtf:

[NeedfulKings]

My wife (BedOfRoses here) is a collector like I am, so we're good. In fact, she may spend more than I do, although several of those purchases were FOR me. As I have several copies of the same titles, she does the same with the authors she collects.

In the end, I have far more books that she does, but my authors are more prolific. And she's a huge King fan, so that collection is basically "ours."

I think I am actually lucky my husband does not collect what I do, else there will be no money left for food!. :wtf:

THAT'S why I'm so frickin' hungry!!!! :rofl:

[Ves'Ka Gan]

My beau mostly gets it--and he has a good time rifling through the shelves at used bookstores looking for that diamond in the rough. He also (mostly) understands the need for different editions of the same book, and actually got me a signed SK for Christmas.

[turtlex]

My beau mostly gets it--and he has a good time rifling through the shelves at used bookstores looking for that diamond in the rough. He also (mostly) understands the need for different editions of the same book, and actually got me a signed SK for Christmas.

I'm lucky like this too... it's that they know it makes us happy, so they participate.

[Ves'Ka Gan]

:D Yes, and my beau is a born bargain hunter, so stopping at every bookstore in a town to dig through the shelves for a first edition I don't have makes him happy, too! We found a first/first of EOTD in pristine condition at a local used bookstore for a mere five dollars--you would have thought HE was the collector!

[pixiedark76]

My husband gets very:angry: mad at me when I buy books. He calls my collecting habit an "obsession" This makes me so upset! :arg:
Although he does sometimes have a right to get angry with me. I have been known to spend way to much money on books. I recently got a lot of books from Donald M. Grant Publishing. I spent so much money that I made the checking account go into a negative balance! My husband hit the roof :pullhair: when he found out how much I had spent. He could not understand :wtf:why I bought a $78.00 book when I could go to a book store and buy the same book for $25.00!
This happened almost 3 weeks ago and he is still bitching at me about it! He is laying a freaking guilt trip on me! He says that I am sending us into the poorhouse and taking food out of our childrens mouths! He says that I don't feel guilty about how much I spend. He says that I don't care that he gets upset with me about buying books. Well you know what, I don't give a shit if he gets upset! :P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P
I have a right to my hobby ("obsession") and nothing he says will stop me!

[jhanic]

Pixie, a good argument about buying Grant books is to just compare the original sales price of one of their Stephen King books and the current value. We'll except the first edition Gunslinger (original price was $20, now if you can find a copy for less than $500 you're doing great!), and use the signed limited Dark Tower VII. Original price was about $225. If you can find one for less than $600, great! Would he object to a 300% increase in value? There are a lot of other examples, too.

John

[inertia1215]

Pixie, a good argument about buying Grant books is to just compare the original sales price of one of their Stephen King books and the current value. We'll except the first edition Gunslinger (original price was $20, now if you can find a copy for less than $500 you're doing great!), and use the signed limited Dark Tower VII. Original price was about $225. If you can find one for less than $600, great! Would he object to a 300% increase in value? There are a lot of other examples, too.

John

This is the argument I use quite often, telling my fiance that I am looking at the books as an investment. She listens enough to my babbling to know that there is a great market out there for books, but shes too smart and knows that me selling my books is like losing a limb, so the argument only holds up for so long! :D

[LadyHitchhiker]

"MORE BOOKS?!?!?!"

[pixiedark76]

Yesterday the shit hit the fan when delivered books and book covers. My husband got really pissed and he flipped out on me! He said that "All I care about are those dam books, You don't care about me or the kids!" Then he walked out and did not come back for two hours! I was so shocked and upset!:panic:

He then came back and said that I will have to return any package that gets delivered! I have no idea what to do! He does not care that I enjoy books and book collecting. Yes I do have a tendency to overspend a little bit, but who doesn't? I just wish my husband could understand and respect my hobby.

[Ricky]

There's only one thing that I don't understand about some collectors. Someone feel free to enlighten me.

Why in the world do some people pay hundreds of dollars for a book and not take the darn shrinkwrap off? If I pay that much for a book, I'm going to look at it! :lol:

[herbertwest]

Yesterday the shit hit the fan when delivered books and book covers. My husband got really pissed and he flipped out on me! He said that "All I care about are those dam books, You don't care about me or the kids!" Then he walked out and did not come back for two hours! I was so shocked and upset!:panic:

He then came back and said that I will have to return any package that gets delivered! I have no idea what to do! He does not care that I enjoy books and book collecting. Yes I do have a tendency to overspend a little bit, but who doesn't? I just wish my husband could understand and respect my hobby.

Ask him if he'd prefer you to buy lots of clothes and shoes instead? And have a giant wardrobe full of shoes? :P

(Only if you dont do books & shoes ^^ )

[jhanic]

Yesterday the shit hit the fan when delivered books and book covers. My husband got really pissed and he flipped out on me! He said that "All I care about are those dam books, You don't care about me or the kids!" Then he walked out and did not come back for two hours! I was so shocked and upset!:panic:

He then came back and said that I will have to return any package that gets delivered! I have no idea what to do! He does not care that I enjoy books and book collecting. Yes I do have a tendency to overspend a little bit, but who doesn't? I just wish my husband could understand and respect my hobby.

Pixie, My condolences on your husband's behavior. I'm not a marriage counselor, but I think this had better be worked out. I'm sure you're both miserable. Why not try sitting down calmly and talk?

John

[Matt]

I'm so sorry you are in that situation pixie, I can't imagine what I would do if Dora didn't support my hobby...and that doesn't include the money and time I spend on this site. :lol:

[Patrick]

Hi pixie, I agree with John's advice about finding a time to sit down and discuss the subject calmly.

One thing I've learned is to try to spread out the buying. Too many shipments too close together can start to bother my wife.

Good luck to you both!

[Earth's Militant Mind]

My books and stuff are important to me and I take great pride in them but in the long run if I don't have some one to share it with then what good is it? In the end we must decide what is important to us there must be balance in every thing. I'm not telling you to quit just asking is it worth it? Some times answer and desire differ.........

[Earth's Militant Mind]

some times they don't

[wizardsrainbow]

Talking it out worked in my case. I had a rough patch for awhile too. She still doesn't "understand" the collecting mentality, but now she supports me because it makes me happy. My compromise is that my collection stays pretty "neutral" meaning that I sell off some books to acquire new ones. But I admit, with a collection of the size of mine, this is rather easier to do than someone with a more modest collection.

[Matt]

My Dora has the same deal with me on cloths. She can have new ones if she rotates out the old ones.

[divemaster]

My wife knows about my 2 book collections (Stephen King and Arkham House). Hard to miss as they take up a lot of shelf space. She doesn't mind me having collected, but she doesn't really like the idea of me actively collecting. Mainly for budget reasons. I just bought an obscenely big house and a new car, and, well, money is tight.

She likes it when I tell her "hey, if worst comes to worst, I've got XX$ grand worth of books." That gets her all juicy. I don't tell her which ones are the "good ones" though. Wouldn't want her grabbing the good stuff if well, worst really did come to worst.

But if I buy new books she wonders where the money comes from and how come she can't spend that same money and anyway she knows I'm not planning on selling so what difference does it make how much the book is or will be worth. She's got a point; can't really argue with that.

My solution? I have a PO Box she does not know about, and a credit card tied to the PO Box address so I buy and pick them up on the sly. I keep the finances, so I'm usually able to launder the $$ in such a way that she can't track it. This last month is proving to be difficult, as I've spent almost $3,000. Yikes.

[sarajean]

My solution? I have a PO Box she does not know about, and a credit card tied to the PO Box address so I buy and pick them up on the sly. I keep the finances, so I'm usually able to launder the $$ in such a way that she can't track it. This last month is proving to be difficult, as I've spent almost $3,000. Yikes.

really? i'm trying very hard not to find this offensive.

[wizardsrainbow]

divemaster, I'd say you may be on a slippery slope there.

[divemaster]

Whatever. The question was asked and I answered it. That's my situation. I make the money for the household. My wife does not work. She "goes shopping." Every week there's a new piece of furniture, or a new mirror or new painting or new stuff for the kitchen. I don't give her much grief for that.

The thing is, she doesn't consider her shopping purchases for herself. They are "for the house" so they don't count in her mind. Me purchasing books are "for me only" so in her mind it's not equitable. In my mind it is b/c I have little to no interest in new household items. We've got plenty of stuff already. In the end, she gets what she wants (for the house, anyway); I get what I want for my bookshelf and I don't have to catch a hard time from her.

If she had a job and was making money and I was taking that on the sly, THAT would be uncalled for. But that's not the case.

[Matt]

You are totally right. You answered honestly and if that's how it's been done, well there we are. :lol:

I think you made some valid points about everyone in the household having money to buy things they consider "important"...if your wife buys house stuff for pleasure as opposed to necessity then I would consider that on the same level as book purchases.

If it were me, instead of the bank account I would try and have an honest conversation with her about it and try to find some kind of middle ground. But that is just me answering from my perspective.

[tippy4]

Divemaster, not telling your wife about every book you buy is one thing, but having a secret PO Box and credit card is another. Regardles of who works and who doesn't, marriage is a 50/50 partnership.

Regarding Pixie's situation, obviously we do not have all the story. Playing devil's advocate here, for all we know her spending is exceding her earning, and the financial strain is concerning her husband. Perhaps she spends all of her her free time reading and buying books, and her husband feels neglected.

Regardless, marriage is about about compromise, as as suggeseted above, they need to sit down and talk it over.

Also, I don't buy the "Ask him if he'd prefer you to buy lots of clothes and shoes instead? And have a giant wardrobe full of shoes?" response (sorry herbertwest) because that implys there HAS to be a problem, and that the book solution is the lesser of two evils.

With me, I just say look, it is a hobby I enjoy, and I don't spend more than I can afford. Like Wiz mentioned above, I too once had a rough patch. I was "between jobs" and I was buying books and my wife got pissed off (and rightly so). For one, I was spending time buying books instead of getting a new job, and two, I was spending money and not earning any. I was wrong and she was right.

[Patrick]

My book buying ebbs and flows with our financial position as well. At times when I get "out of sych" (i.e. overzealous), I hear about it. We have also had discussions in which she has justified certain of her own purchases as being "for us (the family, the house, etc.)" and to which I have pointed out that, no, actually they are not.

In thinking about the secret credit card: Won't that extension of credit, albeit paid responsibly, still show up on a person's credit report for years to come? Might it be revealed inadvertently when making a large joint purchase, such as an automobile or a house?

Anyway, for me personally, I'd rather have it out in the open and have the discussion, or take the heat, on a situational basis as needed.

[Rahfa]

My feeling is never to buy books (or anything like this) on credit...if you pay ten cents on a credit card finance charge, I think that's too much. As long as it's "mad money" it should be fine.

[divemaster]

My feeling is never to buy books (or anything like this) on credit...if you pay ten cents on a credit card finance charge, I think that's too much. As long as it's "mad money" it should be fine.That's good advice. Of course buying online (even with PayPal), having a credit card is almost a must. I haven't carried a balance on my credit card (any credit card) from month-to-month, in, oh, 5 years or so. Buying on credit as a convenience does not necessarily = carrying a balance.


In thinking about the secret credit card: Won't that extension of credit, albeit paid responsibly, still show up on a person's credit report for years to come? Might it be revealed inadvertently when making a large joint purchase, such as an automobile or a house?

I bought a house last year. And a new car last month. Both were financed and both were in both our names. The 50/50 marriage partnership. Y'all may think I'm a shit for my approach to my "mad money" spending (that's fine--I can handle it), but everything I've bought is in both our names. My wife is half owner of the house, the car, and everything else. And when I croak off she'll be the 100% owner of everything (including my book collections), plus investments, life insurance, etc.\

As far as the credit reports go? She doesn't get into the details of financing. She's satisifed that I make the money, I handle taking care of financial dealings. She did pick out the car she wanted (she gets the new one and I take over the old one), and she was the driving force behind which house we bought. Most of the things like this, I'm just along for the ride. And to sign the papers of course. And that's pretty much fine with me. Most of the time, anyway.

[Randall Flagg]

If I could, I'd like to nudge this thread direction to a "softer, gentler" discussion.
I see no positive outcome if this becomes a contentious debate and/or a justification thread.
Of course the members opinions are far more important than mine and will dictate where this goes.

[Patrick]

Thanks for answering my question, divemaster. I really was curious about your thoughts on that.

As in your case, my wife is named on the house as well. I don't recall if we're named on each other's vehicles, but I suppose we should be. My books become her books by default if I go first.

[The Lady of Shadows]

my husband would probably come here, log in as me (he knows all my passwords and usernames to everything), tell you guys it was him and not me, let you know what happened and ask who wanted my books.

:lol:



:unsure:


yeah, :lol:

[Mr. Rabbit Trick]

My books become her books by default if I go first.

And also by divorce! :(

[The Lady of Shadows]

My books become her books by default if I go first.

And also by divorce! :(

ouch. but only if she has a really good attorney. or he has a really bad one. or you live in a community property state i would think. :orely:

[Rahfa]

Actually, what would happen is you would have to come to an agreement on what the books are worth and then the collector would have to "buy" the other partner's half of the books.

In a divorce, they are community property, just like a house. You can keep them, but you need to give the partner 50 percent of their agreed value. Just like a house, that's why most people in that situation end up selling and splitting the actual cash.

[Patrick]

Rahfa is correct.

Personally I have had certain opportunities to keep specific material assets separate, but that's not my style. I comingle everything.

[Randall Flagg]

Newcomers and regulars, how have the responses from your SO been?

[WeDealInLead]

My wife doesn't understand it but as long as things don't get too crazy, she's OK with it. I collect records, buy insanse ammounts of comics/graphic novels and as of lately, books. Mortgage, daughter's education, bills, savings account always come first and after that, it's fair game.

I don't really buy the "I don't ask about shoes/clothes so s/he doesn't ask about books" theory. If we're going into the S/L territorry and prices of $500 and up, does anyone's partner on here really buy $500 shoes? Or a $2000 dress? $6000 jewelery? If you're both buying expensive items, it's safe to assume you're both rather well off and who buys what and for what money doesn't even matter.

[Brice]

I am single. I have no plans to marry and don't really date, but anyone who ever married me would know up front what they were getting into. I mean really they wouldn't really be able to argue that they wouldn't have known when they come over and there are bookcases full of books they can't touch....or even look at too long. This would invalidate their every argument on the subject and if they tried to argue it anyway it would call all their arguments on any and all subjects into question. :lol:

[ELazansky]

My wife's been cool so far. She hasn't asked me about the costs of the books, etc., and I think if she had a problem with it, she would say something to me. Of course, I haven't bought any books over $300 yet, so we'll see what happens at that point.

[turtlex]

I guess I am really lucky. My girlfriend has been known to walk into my very small den and comment ... we really, really need more bookcases! :wub:

[Brice]

Marry her the very second you can.

[turtlex]

Marry her the very second you can.

That's the plan. :thumbsup:

[Mr. Rabbit Trick]

Marry her the very second you can.

That's the plan. :thumbsup:

You could always get some bookcases as a wedding gift :dance:

[Brice]

Marry her the very second you can.

That's the plan. :thumbsup:

You could always get some bookcases as a wedding gift :dance:

:thumbsup:

[Daghain]

Marry her the very second you can.

That's the plan. :thumbsup:

You could always get some bookcases as a wedding gift :dance:

I like the way you think. :D

[Randall Flagg]

I think my wife wishes that I collected money instead of books.

[Ben Staad]

I think my wife wishes that I collected money instead of books.

Very funny! My wife tolerates my collecting however I get the evil eye everytime a new book shows up at the door.

[Mr. Rabbit Trick]

I think my wife wishes that I collected money instead of books.

Very funny! My wife tolerates my collecting however I get the evil eye everytime a new book shows up at the door.

Get a PO Box...or a new wife :)

[Ben Staad]

I think my wife wishes that I collected money instead of books.

Very funny! My wife tolerates my collecting however I get the evil eye everytime a new book shows up at the door.

Get a PO Box...or a new wife :)

In my dreams! The PO Box would be allright however I think she inventories my bookshelves every few weeks...

[Merlin1958]

My wife doesn't seem to mind much though, she has put a firm limit to 2 Barrister Bookcases and the flat headboard of our bed. It's getting dice-y!!! LOL If you've looked in my collection thread she also tolerates my outrageous R&R Art. I did placate her a bit with a "Sue Grafton 1/1 Collection" by way of a shared endeavor. She does however, LOVE Dolso's cases almost as much as I do, so that's a plus. She also thinks his wife is a wonderful woman, so that can't hurt!! LOL

All in all, I guess I'm in pretty good shape over here. Spouse-wise that is.

Oh I also had to move the collection to my "office" which was also a better location for me in the end.

[CRinVA]

For me it's best described as "walking on egg shells" as she groans everytime a book is delivered. She just doesn't get it! And I don't mean just the expesive stuff either. I just got two books from Amazon.com for a combined total of $25 and she gave me the look! It's a good think I love her! :-)

I don't belive she ever "takes inventory" on the bookshelves, but she has noticed that my collection is spreading out to various places in the house! Currently I have King "stuff" in the Bed room, the Living Room, the Family Room, The Rec Room and even in my Workshop. I think I also have a box of cassettes out in the garage! :-)

Someday I will have a room of my own - call it a den or library or study or just Dad's room and I will put all of my colleciton there! Someday (in a galaxay far far away I suppose)!

[WeDealInLead]

She's cool with it. She also doesn't touch the books without asking. That wasn't my idea either. We're running out of room though and she'd like more space for her stuff on shelves.

[biomieg]

My girlfriend supports my collecting habit - she loves buying and reading books as much as I do. She also understands the fun in collecting special editions, various versions of the same title et cetera. But she would never spend as much on a single book as I would. She also does not know exactly how much I spent on my collection (actually - I don't, either). But as long as I pay for the books myself and I still have enough left to pay my part in our household, there is no problem (although she would probably like me to save more - she has about six times as much $$ in her savings account as I have!)

[Mr. Rabbit Trick]

I bough my wife a Kindle and downloaded 2,600 books for her. That should keep her quiet for a bit!

[Erin]

Mr. Rabbit Trick, you win the best husband ever award. How awesome!

[Ari_Racing]

My girlfriend doesn't really know how much do I spend on books, but she knew from the very first moment of our relationship that she'll always have to deal with:

My soccer team.
My book collection
My computer

And even when these three things, she agrees that I'm a pretty simply guy to deal with. :)

[jemaher]

My wife tolerates it with a shoulder shrug and an eye roll. She does not even try to fathom why i have over 100 sl of the dark tower series.

[AKC]

None of those happen to be # 32, # 306, or # 67 do they?
:unsure:

AKC

[The Library Policeman]

She shakes her head a lot. Then goes and buys clothes.

[Roseannebarr]

My wife doesnt know how much the S\L books are worth. She is getting suspicious everytime a box comes from David at Betts Books. I keep telling her that David is a family man and i am trying to support his business by buying a few books each month, and he only sells me the books when they are on sale! i dont think any sane person would believe that anyone would by a $6.95 book for $800. I told her that once and she just laughed and said nobody is that crazy to pay that much for a book. I had to change my middle name to "crazy".

[jemaher]

None of those happen to be # 32, # 306, or # 67 do they?
:unsure:

AKC
I dont think so but i can look

[Patrick]

My wife tolerates it with a shoulder shrug and an eye roll. She does not even try to fathom why i have over 100 sl of the dark tower series.

Holy moly! That is a staggering figure.

So now I have to ask, but please don't feel any pressure to answer if you don't want to...

How many S/L's do you have of each of the seven Dark Tower books?

Again, no worries if you'd rather not say.

[Cook]

I caught a little grief today because of today's S & S S/L, but add that to everything we've spent this year..... Shit!
I'd told her I would take it easy next year..... Ha Ha fat chance. DT 4.5 comes out in february? My only saving grace is the 1st Ed. Stand she had signed at the Va. Mason event this year. Secretly, I think she really enjoys my hobby.

[Patrick]

I caught a little grief today because of today's S & S S/L, but add that to everything we've spent this year..... Shit!
...
For the sake of harmony in your relationship, please send me the book and I'll be happy to reimburse you fully for your expenses.

[Jimimck]

To allow myself a little breathing space, I have indulged my wife with her Barbie Doll collection, and got her a very limited edition doll for Christmas. I think $300 for a doll allows me a nice book or two huh? She should love the surprice next month...

[Cook]

I caught a little grief today because of today's S & S S/L, but add that to everything we've spent this year..... Shit!
...
For the sake of harmony in your relationship, please send me the book and I'll be happy to reimburse you fully for your expenses.
:)

[ChristineB]

My husband makes the money for the household, so I always defer to him when it comes to spending. I have always been acutely aware of my spending habits (while I was in the military I could tell you on a daily basis how much money I had in my checking account, including outstanding checks), so it has been a rocky tranistion to defer to someone else on money matters.

He fully trusts me when it comes to spending, mostly cause I am a major tight ass about it. Our house is still not fully furnished (8 years later) cause I hate how much money it costs to do so (and the quality of the goods is so bad these days). I think I have spent maybe 50$ on clothes/shoes this year... wait that would be 90$ due to the 40$ pair of scuba shoes I got for when we went to Discovery Cove in September. So when I ask him for the money to buy a 1/1 I really want, that isn't the latest one, he's says "sure". He loves books just as much as I do, and since I don't get into the idea of having 1 of ever edition of every book out there, that is not an issue either. :)

There is one thing he has learned, that is to not buy me the books, since there are so many fakes (sigs) and conditions (1/1 vs. 1/13) that goes into getting the book I really want he has learned to just let me find the books I want. He does know I drool over a The Stand S/L, but we are both in a agreement that it is so much money for just one book that that book is one that will be a way future purchase... like when we win the lottery. :)

I don't think he likes how much time I spend sometimes doing the research and being on this forum, but he tolerates it fine, as long as the house gets cleaned, the dog gets taken care of and the food gets made. :)

[Robert Fulman]

I mentioned to my wife that the 11/22/63 S/L was going to be available on Tuesday, and that it might make for a nice Christmas present for a certain someone. Between dealing with a crying baby, a sick kid, and a broken website, I don't think she'll ever forgive me for wasting her entire morning.

[Brice]

If you got your book you don't need forgiveness.

J/k



... Maybe :unsure:

[Robert Fulman]

She was upset because after wasting two hours of her life I was able to order the book in about two seconds by using the link provided here.

[Brice]

Understandably so.

I was just playing around. :)

[Patrick]

Yeah, but now she has the opportunity to spend two minutes at any convenient time entering a lottery to win the purchasing rights for a copy! Hmmmm, not sure you'll score points telling her that.

[wizardsrainbow]

My wife doesnt know how much the S\L books are worth. She is getting suspicious everytime a box comes from David at Betts Books. I keep telling her that David is a family man and i am trying to support his business by buying a few books each month, and he only sells me the books when they are on sale! i dont think any sane person would believe that anyone would by a $6.95 book for $800. I told her that once and she just laughed and said nobody is that crazy to pay that much for a book. I had to change my middle name to "crazy".

Glad I can be of service :-)

[wizardsrainbow]

I gotta run to bed as I start my other job in just a couple hours....I have a long story to tell here, but suffice it to say that I "barely" crossed a dangerous bridge some years ago with my wife....see I started a collection...at my office in NYC....I made good $$ then and the $$ went unnoticed. Then I dipped into my IRA (so stupid I was) to buy a complete DT set...slowly my collection built to over $20,000, then $30,000 and still my wife had no clue I was collecting King. I knew I was in trouble all along (SHAME on me!) but I was scared....finally I confessed...we had a real calling out that day. Today, she is supportive of Betts (well it does help to pay some bills) but the whole collecting mentality escapes her.

[Shannon]

"... finally I confessed ..."

Whew! I can only imagine that conversation, lol.

I try to be honest with my girlfriend about my obsession/hobby (hobby just seems so wrong a word when it's an everyday thing, lol), and every little Stephen King thing I do, she's with me 100% of the way, so ... even if I wanted to, I couldn't hide anything, lol.

[wizardsrainbow]

I have a real appreciation for people with drinking, gambling etc. problems! This collecting stuff is really truly like an addiction to many people...you get so caught up in it at times. I cannot tell you how much work time I "wasted (not the right term)" over the last 20 years surfing/researching for that next book in my collection. Good thing I was the "boss" for most of those years. Also, somehow by now owning Betts, I have legitimized my collection both to myself and to my wife. She "gets" that connection and that my personal collection stands as a possible "inventory reserve" for Betts should I ever need it. And when I finally do "liquidate" my personal collection [shudders at the thought, but recognized at present his 3 children do not share his passion] I have the PERFECT medium for selling...with no consignment fees!!! LOL

[Patrick]

Thanks for sharing that, Wiz. I get your meaning as well. Hope you never have to sell. Thinking of you, Brother!

[Shannon]

For me, quitting Stephen King collecting for a while is like trying to quit smoking ...

I might slow down, but I will always always always have an excuse to buy another pack. Speaking of which ... SMOKE TIME!

And David, I call dibs on any Michael Whelan art/remarques you might have. ;)

[scstandpipe]

My girlfriend has given me the 'eye roll' for 2 years every time books would come to the door and I'd open them, check them out, put on Brodarts, etc. But I really can't blame her because I've got an addictive personality lol so it wasn't even close to a hobby...more of an obsession. It got to the point that I'd spend WAY more time on SK research, auctions, etc. than I would with her or friends/family, so I was really the jerk for a while. I've gotten a LOT better since people pointed out how obsessed I had gotten (and I guess there's nothing wrong with it if that's your priority or what makes you happy), but having to sell my collection to help pay for grad school kind of made it easier to know I was selling for a good reason, and hopefully I can build back up a collection in the future! But yeah, I agree that if family/significant other is important to you, that needs to be your priority, then comes collecting. For me, moderation was the key lol, enough to make you happy :) but not too much to the point where you push away those closest to you who are MUCH more important than books on a shelf...unless we're talking about mothers in law ;)

[ICry4Oy]

I get the eyeroll from my husband every time UPS shows up. Not so much for books, but my addiction to Van's shoes. Have somewhere between 40 and 50 pair now and that's just the classic slip-ons.

[Brice]

My girlfriend has given me the 'eye roll' for 2 years every time books would come to the door and I'd open them, check them out, put on Brodarts, etc. But I really can't blame her because I've got an addictive personality lol so it wasn't even close to a hobby...more of an obsession. It got to the point that I'd spend WAY more time on SK research, auctions, etc. than I would with her or friends/family, so I was really the jerk for a while. I've gotten a LOT better since people pointed out how obsessed I had gotten (and I guess there's nothing wrong with it if that's your priority or what makes you happy), but having to sell my collection to help pay for grad school kind of made it easier to know I was selling for a good reason, and hopefully I can build back up a collection in the future! But yeah, I agree that if family/significant other is important to you, that needs to be your priority, then comes collecting. For me, moderation was the key lol, enough to make you happy :) but not too much to the point where you push away those closest to you who are MUCH more important than books on a shelf...unless we're talking about mothers in law ;)

I figured out a solution to that problem. I sell friends and family members on ebay to buy books. :innocent:

[scstandpipe]

I figured out a solution to that problem. I sell friends and family members on ebay to buy books. :innocent:

Haha that reminds me of This Kid (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1217074/I-grandmother-eBay-joke-says-10-year-old-Zoe-bids-hit-20-000.html) a few years ago who tried to sell her grandma on eBay lol

[Shannon]

lol that was a fun read.

[Merlin1958]

I'm thinking about a lock on the collection room door and hush money to the Mailman!!! LOL

I also need to sneak in another bookcase!!! LOL

[Brice]

20,000 for grandma? I was joking before. :evil:

[Randall Flagg]

New members care to chime in?

[Kingfan24]

Hey guys

My significant other of 5 (Soon to be fiancé unbeknownst to her) has always had kind of a so-so attitude about my collecting. She loves looking at all of the gift editions and the s/l when I receive them but she also has qualms about the money it costs sometimes. She has recently gotten into this site when I'm on it and loves looking at the collections and other members posts.

So basically I think the only issue with my collections is the money it costs sometimes. Other than that she loves it.

[Dolso]

My significant other of 5 (Soon to be fiancé unbeknownst to her) ......... She has recently gotten into this site when I'm on it and loves looking at the collections and other members posts.
.

Is this your way of proposing????:heart:

[Kingfan24]

Haha no no - ill post another thread later in my collections about that

[cit74]

Hadn't seen this thread before - figured I'd chime in. My wife looks over at what I'm doing on iPad at night - and often has to say - oh you're on that site again; my daughter comes home from dental hygienist school and says - oh you're on that website again, you always seem to be on that. Then the 4 year old comes home from day care and asks if any boxes have arrived today. He's all about the gifts (heck he's my son).

Fortunately I usually get home before my wife (her new job keeps her in the office until close to 7 most nights - so I get the boxes, open, cover books, shuffle the library around and put them on shelves. Plus I'm the one that checks the mail. She rarely notices or just lets me do my thing (I think it's a little bit of both). She has no idea of the cost, but knows the books on the shelves are fairly expensive - plus goal number 1/2/3 - are bills, investments, and savings - so I take care of those first, never get behind, and reasonably indulge (or at least that's what the little voice in my head keeps whispering). I also never stop or question her when she buys new clothes or shoes.

And I have recently shown her some pics of the collections - especially bob's basement/library - to get ideas for my ideal room

[needfulthings]

WHAT CAN I SAY THE WIFE BOUGHT ME THIS FOR MY COLLECTION.
http://imageshack.us/a/img828/5007/dscn5595f.jpg

[Cook]

WHAT CAN I SAY THE WIFE BOUGHT ME THIS FOR MY COLLECTION.
http://imageshack.us/a/img828/5007/dscn5595f.jpg

Really? Recently?

[carbinworld]

Well, mine had a REAL problem with my collection ... I hear less about it since I kicked her out :)

[needfulthings]

WHAT CAN I SAY THE WIFE BOUGHT ME THIS FOR MY COLLECTION.
http://imageshack.us/a/img828/5007/dscn5595f.jpg

Really? Recently?
OVER 20 YEARS AGO

[Brice]

WHAT CAN I SAY THE WIFE BOUGHT ME THIS FOR MY COLLECTION.
http://imageshack.us/a/img828/5007/dscn5595f.jpg


You DEFINITELY married the right woman. :D

[needfulthings]

WHAT CAN I SAY THE WIFE BOUGHT ME THIS FOR MY COLLECTION.
http://imageshack.us/a/img828/5007/dscn5595f.jpg


You DEFINITELY married the right woman. :D

49 YEARS NEXT MONTH :couple::nana:

[Ben Staad]

WHAT CAN I SAY THE WIFE BOUGHT ME THIS FOR MY COLLECTION.
http://imageshack.us/a/img828/5007/dscn5595f.jpg


You DEFINITELY married the right woman. :D

49 YEARS NEXT MONTH :couple::nana:

Congrats! I hope you have many more.

[namelessnpoor]

I sometimes get the head shake and eye roll when she sees me on the site, or on ebay or when a package arrives I hear "Is that ANOTHER book? " lol.
She is also amazed at the prices of some of them, not to happy when i spend that much on one, but if i sell one then that seems to be ok !
She is supportive though, even though she says she doesn't understand why some of them cost so much...she says who cares that its signed...its still just a book. I can't say
much about that comment, it is somewhat reflective of Kings own opinion on S/L's
She doesn't understand paying all that much and not reading them either. All in all
she lets me do more or less what i want...i know the price limits..i know how NOT to piss her off !

[wizardsrainbow]

I was an early poster on this thread....My wife and I had some really big issues over my collection at one point.....my solution was I bought Betts Books in 2009...I get packages almost on a daily basis....most are for Betts but a few remain in my collection!

[bdwyer19]

My wife has been pretty supportive of my collection. Shortly after we moved into our house 4 years ago, I suggested turning our living room into a library. Of course I just wanted a nice room to show off my bookcase, but she was onboard with the idea, and has helped make the room look very classy (we now have 8 cases throughout the room!). She has a rough idea how much the books cost, but considering the purchases come out of my personal savings account, she’s not at all bothered by it… just like I’m not bothered by the purses that she buys with her personal money. Last week, we were watching Shawshank on TNT (for about the 3000th time they’ve aired it!). Of course, we were both glued to the tv, as it’s an impossible movie to turn off. At one point, she started asking me about the original story, and said that if the book is anything like the movie, ‘I can see why you like his stories so much!).

[Dolso]

......i know how NOT to piss her off !

Pay attention Tom & Michael!! That is certainly the key to long marriage!!!

( but it doesn't hurt to have a separate checking account, either!!)

[CRinVA]

We don't have separate accoutns - never have since we were married over 30 years ago! :-)

My wife doesn't udnerstand my need to collect, nor even my like of all things King - she has only read one book and watched several moveis. She mostly puts up with my spending but on occassion puts the brakes to it - case in point - it's why I dont own Knowing Darkness, nor have I ordered the S/L The Shining.

Now she gave me a Kindle Fire HD for Christmas but I really think she had an alterior motive - that being that I don't need to buy "physical books" anymore as I can just get the e-version and read on my Kindle for so much less.

We'll continue playing the cat and mouse game and sometimes I'll win , and other times I won't!

[cit74]

......i know how NOT to piss her off !

Pay attention Tom & Michael!! That is certainly the key to long marriage!!!

( but it doesn't hurt to have a separate checking account, either!!)

I agree - the separate accounts are helpful - we have a joint account that I manage and transfer from each paycheck to pay the bills - thats my job - we keep a set amount in our individual checking - and what she does with that I do not ask - and that keeps things nice and easy (although I do know where everything is spent and how much - thats part of managing de monies)

[Brice]

Hopefully upon opening it you were smart enough to not point out that now you now won't have to buy reading copies of all the rare books you're going to buy. LOL

David, nice diversionary tactic. I imagine you have so many books coming and going she doesn't know which are yours and which are Betts. :innocent:

Congratulations Bruce! :D

[stkmw02]

I just tell my husband I get all my books for free now that I'm a librarian... :evil:

Actually, he supports my collecting habit. And he should, since he collects waaay weirder things than I do.

[thegunslinger41]

This is an funny thread--a support group of sorts. My wife also give me "the eye." But she knows that months and months will go by without any packages coming in, so I think that helps keep her sanity. She did catch me quickly hiding a box in our office from Cemetary Dance. We had company over that day and when I answered the door to let our guests in I saw a box there...so I quickly tried to hide it. She commenced to say, "you have a disease!" and I replied, "well, it's either some books here and there or I start spending all my free time hanging around elemantary schools with pockets full of candy!!!!!" :)

G

[sgc1999]

she knows I try to get home first to quickly bring in any packages and put them in my office. I thought I was clever and getting away with it, but she brought it up recently with some friends :scared:
fortunately she just joked about it. :D

[EXPLORER]

My wife has been very supportive..... thank goodness.
She loves to travel and has joined me on many trips to Signing events, etc and considers it a benefit of collecting. ("We have to go to this"... "Yeah sounds good")
She watched and wondered a bit when I would stalk outside the NBC studio door or backdoor to some event, however eventually became adept at placing her self
strategically where she would have an opportunity if I missed one or we both could get something signed.

[needfulthings]

or we both could get something signed.:nana:

[greenhorn1]

At least books don't take up a lot of space! I've been collecting art for about 7 years now and have over 150 prints and originals hanging throughout the house (and about another hundred in a flat file that I don't have room or money to hang). And I'm into pinball and some guys in my pinball league have nearly 50 games set up in their houses. I think the common thread regardless of what you collect is 1. be responsible with your spending. That doesn't mean don't spend insane amounts on things, but make sure you pay the bills first! and 2. make sure your obsession doesn't overrule time/attention you spend on your significant other. I think the only time my gf really gets annoyed with my collecting is when I tell her I can't do something because I have to be near a computer for a release or when I leave mailing tubes scattered all throughout the house.

[The Library Policeman]

I just tell my husband I get all my books for free now that I'm a librarian... :evil:

Actually, he supports my collecting habit. And he should, since he collects waaay weirder things than I do.

Lol. What does he collect?

[needfulthings]

[QUOTE=greenhorn1;752283]At least books don't take up a lot of space!
BULLSHIT
http://imageshack.us/a/img541/9495/img616.jpg

[Merlin1958]

WHAT CAN I SAY THE WIFE BOUGHT ME THIS FOR MY COLLECTION.
http://imageshack.us/a/img828/5007/dscn5595f.jpg


You DEFINITELY married the right woman. :D

49 YEARS NEXT MONTH :couple::nana:

33 Yrs here in May. When you get a good woman ya gotta hold on, right Bruce???

Edit: My wife still occasionally "Rolls her eyes", but since my collection is more or less "complete" and I', just into "upgrades" less and less. She does fully support my HF actions though to her credit. She's constantly asking "What are we up to, hon"? LOL FWIW she thinks you guys need to pound the "Widget"!!! LOL

[Cook]

WHAT CAN I SAY THE WIFE BOUGHT ME THIS FOR MY COLLECTION.
http://imageshack.us/a/img828/5007/dscn5595f.jpg


You DEFINITELY married the right woman. :D

49 YEARS NEXT MONTH :couple::nana:

33 Yrs here in May. When you get a good woman ya gotta hold on, right Bruce???

Edit: My wife still occasionally "Rolls her eyes", but since my collection is more or less "complete" and I', just into "upgrades" less and less. She does fully support my HF actions though to her credit. She's constantly asking "What are we up to, hon"? LOL FWIW she thinks you guys need to pound the "Widget"!!! LOL

Pound the Widget huh..... Lol

[stkmw02]

Alan... he collects movie props and promotional items, McFarlane figures, and interesting odds-n-ends like Ghostbuster cartoon cells. lol It's really neat stuff, but things that accumulate over time and seem to usually cost quite a bit more than my books (since I don't go for S/L or flatsigned etc.) Since he spends his money and I spend my money when it comes to collections, neither of us complains.

[Merlin1958]

WHAT CAN I SAY THE WIFE BOUGHT ME THIS FOR MY COLLECTION.
http://imageshack.us/a/img828/5007/dscn5595f.jpg


You DEFINITELY married the right woman. :D

49 YEARS NEXT MONTH :couple::nana:

33 Yrs here in May. When you get a good woman ya gotta hold on, right Bruce???

Edit: My wife still occasionally "Rolls her eyes", but since my collection is more or less "complete" and I', just into "upgrades" less and less. She does fully support my HF actions though to her credit. She's constantly asking "What are we up to, hon"? LOL FWIW she thinks you guys need to pound the "Widget"!!! LOL

Pound the Widget huh..... Lol

Well, to be honest she never said "Pound", but honest she is into the whole "do for others" thing and does ask for daily totals!!!

[The Library Policeman]

Alan... he collects movie props and promotional items, McFarlane figures, and interesting odds-n-ends like Ghostbuster cartoon cells. lol It's really neat stuff, but things that accumulate over time and seem to usually cost quite a bit more than my books (since I don't go for S/L or flatsigned etc.) Since he spends his money and I spend my money when it comes to collections, neither of us complains.

Sounds like a good system to me :)

[Kingfan24]

I just told my significant other i possibly have matching s/l shining and dr. Sleep and she didn't understand my excitement.... Lol oh well you guys do.

[WeDealInLead]

Book collecting is pretty irrational behaviour if you really think about it. Basically, I fully understand why 99.99% of the planet doesn't understand me. I talk about it with my co-workers and friends and other than "it looks cool", or "it makes me happy", or "because I can and want to" I have no logical explanation for it.

[Mr. Rabbit Trick]

"it makes me happy", is all that matters.

[Brice]

Yeah, I'd say there's no more logical explanation than happiness. 'Tis the best rationale for anything you do. :)

[Kingfan24]

Book collecting helps us feel closer to the author and gives a more personal connection to the stories. I think that is a big part of why a lot of people collect.

[Randall Flagg]

I just collect books to meet cool chicks...:rose:

[needfulthings]

I just collect books to meet cool chicks...:rose:
http://imageshack.us/a/img706/6207/dscn7041n.jpg

[stkmw02]

Same here, Jerome. Although perhaps not with the same intentions. ;)

[Randall Flagg]

Same here, Jerome. Although perhaps not with the same intentions. ;)
But with the same results?

[Merlin1958]

I just told my significant other i possibly have matching s/l shining and dr. Sleep and she didn't understand my excitement.... Lol oh well you guys do.

While I certainly share your enthusiasm, stay in your own fucking bed, friend!!!! LOL LOL LOL

[TwistedNadine]

Interesting thread.
Personally, if my "significant other" gave me crap for collecting he wouldn't remain significant for very long. I have my priorities.

[Bad Penny]

** snicker **

[Merlin1958]

Interesting thread.
Personally, if my "significant other" gave me crap for collecting he wouldn't remain significant for very long. I have my priorities.

You go girl!!! (head snap) LOL LOL

[Brice]

Interesting thread.
Personally, if my "significant other" gave me crap for collecting he wouldn't remain significant for very long. I have my priorities.

THIS!^

I have no other significant or otherwise. Any potential other just has to accept that the books and stuff were here first.

[webstar1000]

This is sweet stuff.. thanks BioMEg!!!

[Sir_Boomme]

Doggies like books....
sniff sniff
mmmm, leather books smell gooood....

Yum Yums!

Woof!

[becca69]

He doesn't mind and sometimes goes to signings with me, or it could be because the collection is worth more than the car :lol:

[webstar1000]

He doesn't mind and sometimes goes to signings with me, or it could be because the collection is worth more than the car :lol:

LOL.

I bet you it is a bit easier to be a woman collector cause all you have to do is prove the value and men drool.... It is the only way I can with my wife. I have to prove she could sell them at any time if we needed to and make money. That comforts her... but she wears the pants in this relationship:(

[The Library Policeman]

My significant other thinks I'm a dick :lol:

She doesn't get the whole "book thing".

[stroppygoblin]

My wife doesn't understand it either. But I don't smoke, I rarely drink (purely a social drinker, never touch a drop at home) and I have no other vices other than the books.

She'd kill me if she knew how much I'd actually spent mind you.... :eek: Still, I never ask about the cost of a new handbag/pair of shoes/house ornament/cushions, etc, etc...

[dnemec]

Interesting thread. My boyfriend is just about done with his Master's degree, so I am the sugar momma 'round here for at least a little while longer. His view generally is: if we can afford it, go for it. But he does give me shit occasionally. Yesterday, he was in my office staring at my bookcases and asked: "Do you have any idea how much money you spent on all these books?" To which I replied: "Ummm...do you really want to know?"

Btw, I have no idea how much I spent on all my books because then I would have to tell. And I won't do it. :nope:

[Merlin1958]

I've been married for 34 years now and I have one piece of good advice for a happy marriage. LIE!!! Both ways!! Who really needs to know the truth if you are happy and healthy???? LOL

[stroppygoblin]

"Plausible Deniability"

Remember this phrase. :)

[The Library Policeman]

I've been married for 34 years now and I have one piece of good advice for a happy marriage. LIE!!! Both ways!! Who really needs to know the truth if you are happy and healthy???? LOL

Lol good advice, Bill. :)

[webstar1000]

I've been married for 34 years now and I have one piece of good advice for a happy marriage. LIE!!! Both ways!! Who really needs to know the truth if you are happy and healthy???? LOL

Lol good advice, Bill. :)
It works. lol

[Mr. Rabbit Trick]

The spouse will always be the winner anyway. (divorce or death) :)

[ICry4Oy]

I've bought off ebay before and when the item showed up I used the "WOW I bought this 2 or 3 years ago and completely forgot about it, what a surprise!" excuse.

[Br!an]

... she wears the pants in this relationship:(

I certainly hope you both wear pants. :emot-butt:

[webstar1000]

I've bought off ebay before and when the item showed up I used the "WOW I bought this 2 or 3 years ago and completely forgot about it, what a surprise!" excuse.

LOL LOVE this one! Should start a thread with the most outlandish lies told to spouses to cover our collecting habits. lol

[webstar1000]

... she wears the pants in this relationship:(

I certainly hope you both wear pants. :emot-butt:

:cowboy: nope just my cowboy hat:) haha

[stroppygoblin]

I have used the "paid for this years ago and forgot all about it"

Other classics are:

1. It's not for me, I'm letting someone in the US use my address, I'll be forwarding it on. (then let it hide behind other books for a while)
2. I bought this to sell, not to keep. definitely be a small profit in it
3. This was a bargain, it was on ebay and no-one else bid.
4. all of these? Oh it was a 'grab bag' from a publisher. They are worth far more than I paid.
5. This? No idea it was coming, It's a present from another collector for helping them out.

[ICry4Oy]

Love the "It's a present" one and will have to use it....after eating the packing slip!

In a matter of irony, when or if "Pure" ever shows up I'll probably use the "bought it years ago" excuse - because I did - and won't be believed. :(

[webstar1000]

I have used the "paid for this years ago and forgot all about it"

Other classics are:

1. It's not for me, I'm letting someone in the US use my address, I'll be forwarding it on. (then let it hide behind other books for a while)
2. I bought this to sell, not to keep. definitely be a small profit in it
3. This was a bargain, it was on ebay and no-one else bid.
4. all of these? Oh it was a 'grab bag' from a publisher. They are worth far more than I paid.
5. This? No idea it was coming, It's a present from another collector for helping them out.

I have used a few of these... love #4 and #5 though. LOL My best one is "WOW! I cannot believe it... I never ordered this!" She says "bullshit, no one would send you a random King book with a signature on it." (she knows 90% of my stuff comes from David at Bett's) so I wrote a fake email to my self from a bullshit account from David saying "I sent you a belated Bday gift!" LOL She bought it. LOL

[divemaster]

I have a PO Box, known only to me...

[needfulthings]

I'm just glad I am on the down hill side of collecting & can sit back & enjoy it.

[Merlin1958]

Of course, there is the one perk of being "The Haven Fund Whore. "Honey, it's a donated book for the HF". LOL