Linus's Blanket (by request from Candy)

[candy]

Really? Wheeeeeeeee!

Had a horrible dream that my book was absolute crap, and that numerous people were telling me I shouldn't bother trying to publish it because of that.

I just want to save the world...

its not!! i have unfortunatley had crappy things going on, but never fear i have printed it off and still plan to do a proper critique for you

[Jon]

Well...I love it!

[LadyHitchhiker]

I think the ending isn't what I wanted it to be, but I really don't know how to end it. I mean, my grief hasn't ended - may never - so how do you end a book like that?

Maybe with a "visit your doctor regularly" spiel? Meh... I don't know...

[alinda]

I too have made a copy ( hope you don't mind)
Its like an advance copy , I'll send you a page to
autograph ...for when your famous as an author
as well as actress.

[LadyHitchhiker]

I don't mind at all sweet Linda... I hope you enjoy it.

[alinda]

[LadyHitchhiker]

679 views?? Wow! So people really are reading it! Yaaayy!

[LadyHitchhiker]

1679 people have viewed my story at www.petlovers.com so far.

479 people have read it at www.thecatsite.com (without the new epilogue)

So combined that is 2939 views of the story!!!!!!!!!! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Jean]

this is great!

[LadyHitchhiker]

I altered the story a bit a few days ago: there is a brand new afterword...

[LadyHitchhiker]

Some new afterthoughts

After a while in your journey of life, you realize a few things.

Sometimes the love you thought was real, isn't real. That it was an illusion. A mirage. Now, that wasn't the case when it came to Linus, but it was the truth when it came to my love with my husband. After dealing with his anger, his controlling nature, the emotional abuse, the isolation, and his manipulation, I realized suddenly what love I truly had in my life. And that was not with him.

I asked him to go to counseling, because I believe in the sanctity of the marital union and wanted to make things work. Instead, he changed the locks on the apartment. I began studying mental health cases, trying to figure out if it was me, or him, that he could get over me so quickly. And I swiftly realized my love for him was not real. My love was for the illusion that he had made and could not maintain. My love was not for the sociopath that I was married to. It was for what I thought I had. Sometimes letting go of an illusion is harder, because one has denied the truth to oneself for so long. Familiarity can cause a person to stay where they are far longer than is safe for their health, mental, emotional, and physical. But it doesn't have to stay that way forever.

My truth, is that my true love, was Linus. Linus loved me just the way I am, and I am holding back my heart this time when it comes to a romantic relationship for someone who loves me as much as Linus loved me and who loves cats. It may be a life-time wait, but that will be okay. I will be surrounded by others who love me and accept me for who I am. I will not settle for less. I will never again have a man saying when someone is hurting "oh well we need to save up for a car instead". I will not have a man defending someone else for being "hurt" by a cat when I am grieving with all my heart and mind and soul. I will not have a man mimicking emotions, searching for suitable response. I will not have an actor in my life. I want a real man.

In the meantime, while I wait, I live back at home with my mother, my brother, the cats: Mandarin, Majel, Metro, Shebrie and the Westie: Travis McGee. I am surrounded by those who love me and accept me just for who I am. What else could one ask for?

I don't know what I will next encounter in my journey, but in the meantime I am reclaiming myself. I am reclaiming my enduring love for Linus. And it is unfortunate that his body rests in my mother-in-law's soil and that Mandarin can't join him, but my mother repeatedly reminds me, "It's okay, Liz. That's just his shell. That's just his body. He will meet you at the Rainbow Bridge. He's waiting there for you. Just remember, it's just his body. He's with us every day. And Mandarin, well, we'll figure out something special for him."

Linus, you are with me every day. And I sing at least one Beatles song a day just for you. Because I will always love you, across the universe.