CRinVA
05-25-2007, 10:16 AM
I wrote the following poem in response to a contest held on the King's Closet Web Page (run by our very own SirBoomme). I won first place in that contest and a year or so later decided to submit the poem which tells the entire Dark Tower tale from The Gunslinger to The Dark Tower in roughly 2,2000 words. Hold the Bye Bye Miss American Pie tune in your head as you read the poem - and let mw know what you think!
My poem was published in Lighthouse VI Stephen King Special Issue III in 2006 and due to urging from Stu & Penny Tinker who both loved the work, I have sent a copy to Stephen King's office. I haven't heard anything back, but one can always hope! :-)
The following work is based on the fiction of Stephen King. It is for entertainment purposes only and will not monetarily benefit me or thedarktower.org.
CAN’ Ka No Rey
by Bob Ireland
West of Gilead and a long, long time ago
a Man in Black was on the go,
He raced across the hardened pan
followed by the last Gunslinger known as Roland.
Roland knew he had one chance
to catch the magical man and make him dance
From the Golgatha and deep in trance
With a jaw bone leaving nothing to chance
They did palaver at their final stance
As Ka did guide him, nothing left to chance.
Along the beach while Roland slept
With a dud a chum and dud a chik
A lobstrosity with poisonous zeal
took two fingers with nary a snip
A long time it’d be for Roland to heal.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood and fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”
Along the beach stood a magical door
One for the pusher, one for the whore
If the man jesus and manni tell you so
drawn from to whens to save their mortal soul.
And now the ka-tet was but three
Roland told of the Tower, their quest to be.
For in the clearing they did rest
Not knowing that their very first test
As Shardik chased the pusher up a tree.
But Suzannah’s aim was oh so tight
And Shardik’s dome was blown from sight
It was ka and khef their destiny to be.
From within a demon ring
A door was drawn, Eddie’s key we know
Saved from the doorkeeper, but for a price,
Jake was reborn while the seed was placed
Mordred’s spawn was evilly placed
Where it would grow and grow and grow.
Jake of New York, the gunslinger’s paradox
While along the trail a critter came,
Soft and cuddly not unlike a fox
He mimicked and chattered a funny game
And quickly Oy became his true name.
Through River Crossing and on to Lud
Aunt Talitha did warn them so
The Gasherman’s face was aglow,
With pus and poison for all to know
The Tick Tock Man was the lowest crud
But in the end his blood did flow.
A pink mono waiting in the Cradle of Lud
Blaine the Pain their way to pass
God Drums pounded from above,
As Blaine release the poisonous gas
The Grays and Pubes did choke below
As Blaine set out with ka-tet in tow.
Faster and faster along the track
Blaine loved riddles that’s a fact
Through the Wastelands he did go
But would he stop they did not know
Till the end when Eddie wise cracked.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood for fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”
Topeka behind them, thinnies aside
Roland told a tale for the Tet to abide
Of his friends Alain and Cuthbert too
Rhea of the Coos, a witch with a glass
Big Coffin Hunters, a pain in the ass.
Of Susan Delgado of that you’d know
She died for sure oh Char You tree
But not the idiot savant Sheemie,
For Roland sought the Tower over thee
A gunslinger’s Ka, his destiny.
Through a glass palace the ka-tet must past
Back to End-world, was it Todash
But first a re-aquantance with the Tick Tock Man
Brought back to life by a man named Flagg
Twas a quick fight, the work of Gan.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood for fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”
The men of the Calla called on the Ka-Tet
Afraid of the wolves that rode from Thunderclap
That sucked out the brains of many a child
Roont for life, to feed the breakers, an idea so wild
While brewing and growing was Mia’s chap.
This is where the story gets bold
Pere Callahan comes from another world they’re told
He bears black 13, a doorway to hell
Its shiny and glimmering and scary as well
But gives the ka-tet a path to the rose.
Andy the messenger gives hints do tell
A flowmetal face, shiny as well
Did coerce a good folken to betray his clan
While Jake eavesdropped in the Dogan
A learned of the plan straight from hell.
The battle was swift, the oriza flew true
The wolves were defeated, their time was due
But all is not rosy as Suzannah is lost
Kidnapped by Mia, everyone knew
A Victory for the Calla at an ominous cost.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood for fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”
The tet is off to various whens and wheres
Suzannah/Mia in New York or Discordia do ya ken
Roland and Eddie to rural Maine must go,
Away from End World to another when
To save Calvin Tower and meet a certain writer we know
Jake and the Pere to the Dixie Pig show
For one of them this battle will be his last show.
Mordred the chap was born of Mia his mother
Twas her, not Suzannah the same or another
He was not child, not spider, but a little of both,
A very hungry chap that ate his host
A ravenous changling born of the Crimson King
But also of Roland, who he hated the most.
Randall Flagg agent of the Crimson King
Returned unexpected evil dealings unknown
This old nemesis of Roland’s was chewed to the bone
For Mordred was hungry, a loney chap
Mordred was hungry and all alone.
The Ka-Tet is reunited with a plan you will see
The attack on Algul Siento for breakers to free
Breakers dining on the brainfood of Calla Roont child
Telepaths pushing and pulling aside
The beam was a falling by me.
Unlikely allies in Dinky and Ted
And Sheemie of course, the strongest of head,
Joined forces with Roland, Eddie and Oy
And Suzannah no legs and Jake the boy
To fight thine enemy till all were dead.
The smoke cleared, the battle was won
The beam was healing thyself one by one
But all was not well as Eddie was no more,
Fallen in battle, a gunslinger no more
The Ka-tet was broken, was it Ka or Gan.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood for fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”
With no time left to grieve
Roland, Jake and Oy they did leave
To the when of 19 and 99,
To the world that went forward all of the time
The Tale must be saved, it was their destiny.
Walking a country road, a safe place to be
Not with a blue van, two dogs and a man
An unlikely ally named Mrs. T.
A young boy, a gunslinger, not yet a man
Stepped in the way of the oncoming van
To save the writer and rewrite history.
Jake died not once, but three times for sure
Under the mountain, facing the Man in Black
Under the wheels of a car that rolled over his back,
He told Roland there are other worlds than this
But did he know he’d travel to the keystone world
To save Sai King from a near death miss.
Roland grieved the loss of his son
Jake, Heil Gunslinger, he placed in a grave
A rose for a marker for the world he did save,
Jake led to the clearing at the end of the path
Would watch over Roland till his war was won.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood for fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”
The Gunslinger, the dark woman, to finish the quest
With Oy at their sides, no time to spare
Raced through the blackness, chased by a demon
Twas a monster worm with fangs of steel.
Saved by their sterno, an unlikely weapon I jest
Roland ran to the light and did his best
To leave Castle Discordia at his rear.
The White Lands of Empathica snowy and dark
Tailed by Mordred, twas hungry he was
They came upon ODD’s LANE and a funny man.
Joe Collins entertained, standup he does
But something true did not ring
For soon enough Roland was choking.
Eddie of New York would have known right away
ODD LANE, DANDELO – two ways to say
Roland let down his guard, Suzannah slow to learn.
Until in the medicine cabinet a hint came her way
The favor returned by the wordsmith of Maine
His cryptic note did save the day.
The artist was released, but could not say
Target of the Crimson King in another place
A prisoner in Empathica, no tongue in the way
Destined long ago to save a Gunslinger one day.
His name was Patrick Danville for sure
Drawing was his life, and also the cure.
He joined Roland and Oy for the end of their race.
Stuttering Bill drove the un tet away
To the field of roses that beyond did lay
While somewhere not too far behind,
Mordred found a beast, on which to dine
A poisoned beast that fed the beast
The lonely, cold and now dying beast
For Mordred was a dying.
A zit, a pimple, a cancer for sure
Patrick erased it a simple cure,
Did spark in Suzannah a plan to escape
A doorway in emptiness, a door way gate
For her role was over, her time had come.
Suzannah left Roland, the job still undone
Her quest was over, for that she knew
She vanished in emptiness, Roland was blue.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood for fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”
Roland grew tired, empty of heart you know
He neared the Tower, Patrick and Oy in tow.
Tired and hungry he needed sleep
Patrick left to draw, watched over his keep.
While Mordred spied finally it was time
Patrick dozed, guarding no more
Mordred was hungry time to dine.
One mistake Mordred did make
Twas a billy bumbler, friend of Jake
That became the unlikely hero.
That his life his ka he did forsake
To save the Gunslinger, father of Jake.
The field of roses, the tower above
The Crimson King a formidable foe,
The tower called Roland come to me now
Finally at last the end of the show.
They traded wits and sneetches were tossed
No way to cross the roses, the battle was lost
Till Roland rememberd, the artist was here,
He drew things beautifully, made them appear
And like the cancer on Suzannah’s face
Could erase the Crismon King from this very place.
A drawing in pencil, rose smudges for eyes
The Crimson King was drawn, as sneetches flied
Erased fine lines, his face, his nose,
All that remained were those eyes, I suppose,
As Roland the Gunslinger to the tower came
Roland of Gilead remembered all, their name
Roland the only one that remained.
The room at the top, what did he see
The room at the top his travesty.
Roland saw nary a friend
Only that he must do it again
It was Ka, this cycle his destiny.
West of Gilead and a long, long time ago
a Man in Black was on the go,
He raced across the hardened pan
followed by the last Gunslinger known as Roland.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood for fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”
My poem was published in Lighthouse VI Stephen King Special Issue III in 2006 and due to urging from Stu & Penny Tinker who both loved the work, I have sent a copy to Stephen King's office. I haven't heard anything back, but one can always hope! :-)
The following work is based on the fiction of Stephen King. It is for entertainment purposes only and will not monetarily benefit me or thedarktower.org.
CAN’ Ka No Rey
by Bob Ireland
West of Gilead and a long, long time ago
a Man in Black was on the go,
He raced across the hardened pan
followed by the last Gunslinger known as Roland.
Roland knew he had one chance
to catch the magical man and make him dance
From the Golgatha and deep in trance
With a jaw bone leaving nothing to chance
They did palaver at their final stance
As Ka did guide him, nothing left to chance.
Along the beach while Roland slept
With a dud a chum and dud a chik
A lobstrosity with poisonous zeal
took two fingers with nary a snip
A long time it’d be for Roland to heal.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood and fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”
Along the beach stood a magical door
One for the pusher, one for the whore
If the man jesus and manni tell you so
drawn from to whens to save their mortal soul.
And now the ka-tet was but three
Roland told of the Tower, their quest to be.
For in the clearing they did rest
Not knowing that their very first test
As Shardik chased the pusher up a tree.
But Suzannah’s aim was oh so tight
And Shardik’s dome was blown from sight
It was ka and khef their destiny to be.
From within a demon ring
A door was drawn, Eddie’s key we know
Saved from the doorkeeper, but for a price,
Jake was reborn while the seed was placed
Mordred’s spawn was evilly placed
Where it would grow and grow and grow.
Jake of New York, the gunslinger’s paradox
While along the trail a critter came,
Soft and cuddly not unlike a fox
He mimicked and chattered a funny game
And quickly Oy became his true name.
Through River Crossing and on to Lud
Aunt Talitha did warn them so
The Gasherman’s face was aglow,
With pus and poison for all to know
The Tick Tock Man was the lowest crud
But in the end his blood did flow.
A pink mono waiting in the Cradle of Lud
Blaine the Pain their way to pass
God Drums pounded from above,
As Blaine release the poisonous gas
The Grays and Pubes did choke below
As Blaine set out with ka-tet in tow.
Faster and faster along the track
Blaine loved riddles that’s a fact
Through the Wastelands he did go
But would he stop they did not know
Till the end when Eddie wise cracked.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood for fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”
Topeka behind them, thinnies aside
Roland told a tale for the Tet to abide
Of his friends Alain and Cuthbert too
Rhea of the Coos, a witch with a glass
Big Coffin Hunters, a pain in the ass.
Of Susan Delgado of that you’d know
She died for sure oh Char You tree
But not the idiot savant Sheemie,
For Roland sought the Tower over thee
A gunslinger’s Ka, his destiny.
Through a glass palace the ka-tet must past
Back to End-world, was it Todash
But first a re-aquantance with the Tick Tock Man
Brought back to life by a man named Flagg
Twas a quick fight, the work of Gan.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood for fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”
The men of the Calla called on the Ka-Tet
Afraid of the wolves that rode from Thunderclap
That sucked out the brains of many a child
Roont for life, to feed the breakers, an idea so wild
While brewing and growing was Mia’s chap.
This is where the story gets bold
Pere Callahan comes from another world they’re told
He bears black 13, a doorway to hell
Its shiny and glimmering and scary as well
But gives the ka-tet a path to the rose.
Andy the messenger gives hints do tell
A flowmetal face, shiny as well
Did coerce a good folken to betray his clan
While Jake eavesdropped in the Dogan
A learned of the plan straight from hell.
The battle was swift, the oriza flew true
The wolves were defeated, their time was due
But all is not rosy as Suzannah is lost
Kidnapped by Mia, everyone knew
A Victory for the Calla at an ominous cost.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood for fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”
The tet is off to various whens and wheres
Suzannah/Mia in New York or Discordia do ya ken
Roland and Eddie to rural Maine must go,
Away from End World to another when
To save Calvin Tower and meet a certain writer we know
Jake and the Pere to the Dixie Pig show
For one of them this battle will be his last show.
Mordred the chap was born of Mia his mother
Twas her, not Suzannah the same or another
He was not child, not spider, but a little of both,
A very hungry chap that ate his host
A ravenous changling born of the Crimson King
But also of Roland, who he hated the most.
Randall Flagg agent of the Crimson King
Returned unexpected evil dealings unknown
This old nemesis of Roland’s was chewed to the bone
For Mordred was hungry, a loney chap
Mordred was hungry and all alone.
The Ka-Tet is reunited with a plan you will see
The attack on Algul Siento for breakers to free
Breakers dining on the brainfood of Calla Roont child
Telepaths pushing and pulling aside
The beam was a falling by me.
Unlikely allies in Dinky and Ted
And Sheemie of course, the strongest of head,
Joined forces with Roland, Eddie and Oy
And Suzannah no legs and Jake the boy
To fight thine enemy till all were dead.
The smoke cleared, the battle was won
The beam was healing thyself one by one
But all was not well as Eddie was no more,
Fallen in battle, a gunslinger no more
The Ka-tet was broken, was it Ka or Gan.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood for fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”
With no time left to grieve
Roland, Jake and Oy they did leave
To the when of 19 and 99,
To the world that went forward all of the time
The Tale must be saved, it was their destiny.
Walking a country road, a safe place to be
Not with a blue van, two dogs and a man
An unlikely ally named Mrs. T.
A young boy, a gunslinger, not yet a man
Stepped in the way of the oncoming van
To save the writer and rewrite history.
Jake died not once, but three times for sure
Under the mountain, facing the Man in Black
Under the wheels of a car that rolled over his back,
He told Roland there are other worlds than this
But did he know he’d travel to the keystone world
To save Sai King from a near death miss.
Roland grieved the loss of his son
Jake, Heil Gunslinger, he placed in a grave
A rose for a marker for the world he did save,
Jake led to the clearing at the end of the path
Would watch over Roland till his war was won.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood for fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”
The Gunslinger, the dark woman, to finish the quest
With Oy at their sides, no time to spare
Raced through the blackness, chased by a demon
Twas a monster worm with fangs of steel.
Saved by their sterno, an unlikely weapon I jest
Roland ran to the light and did his best
To leave Castle Discordia at his rear.
The White Lands of Empathica snowy and dark
Tailed by Mordred, twas hungry he was
They came upon ODD’s LANE and a funny man.
Joe Collins entertained, standup he does
But something true did not ring
For soon enough Roland was choking.
Eddie of New York would have known right away
ODD LANE, DANDELO – two ways to say
Roland let down his guard, Suzannah slow to learn.
Until in the medicine cabinet a hint came her way
The favor returned by the wordsmith of Maine
His cryptic note did save the day.
The artist was released, but could not say
Target of the Crimson King in another place
A prisoner in Empathica, no tongue in the way
Destined long ago to save a Gunslinger one day.
His name was Patrick Danville for sure
Drawing was his life, and also the cure.
He joined Roland and Oy for the end of their race.
Stuttering Bill drove the un tet away
To the field of roses that beyond did lay
While somewhere not too far behind,
Mordred found a beast, on which to dine
A poisoned beast that fed the beast
The lonely, cold and now dying beast
For Mordred was a dying.
A zit, a pimple, a cancer for sure
Patrick erased it a simple cure,
Did spark in Suzannah a plan to escape
A doorway in emptiness, a door way gate
For her role was over, her time had come.
Suzannah left Roland, the job still undone
Her quest was over, for that she knew
She vanished in emptiness, Roland was blue.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood for fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”
Roland grew tired, empty of heart you know
He neared the Tower, Patrick and Oy in tow.
Tired and hungry he needed sleep
Patrick left to draw, watched over his keep.
While Mordred spied finally it was time
Patrick dozed, guarding no more
Mordred was hungry time to dine.
One mistake Mordred did make
Twas a billy bumbler, friend of Jake
That became the unlikely hero.
That his life his ka he did forsake
To save the Gunslinger, father of Jake.
The field of roses, the tower above
The Crimson King a formidable foe,
The tower called Roland come to me now
Finally at last the end of the show.
They traded wits and sneetches were tossed
No way to cross the roses, the battle was lost
Till Roland rememberd, the artist was here,
He drew things beautifully, made them appear
And like the cancer on Suzannah’s face
Could erase the Crismon King from this very place.
A drawing in pencil, rose smudges for eyes
The Crimson King was drawn, as sneetches flied
Erased fine lines, his face, his nose,
All that remained were those eyes, I suppose,
As Roland the Gunslinger to the tower came
Roland of Gilead remembered all, their name
Roland the only one that remained.
The room at the top, what did he see
The room at the top his travesty.
Roland saw nary a friend
Only that he must do it again
It was Ka, this cycle his destiny.
West of Gilead and a long, long time ago
a Man in Black was on the go,
He raced across the hardened pan
followed by the last Gunslinger known as Roland.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about Eddie’s widowed bride,
And something touched me deep inside
The day the bumbler died.
So bye-bye, the Ka-tet of five.
Drove my bucca along the beam
But the beam was falling down.
Vampires and Can-Toi drinking blood for fun
Roland Singing, "com com comala this ka-tet of mine.”
"com com comala now the journey’s done.”