My everything

[Letti]

Okay. I hope I start this thread at the right place if not please feel free to move or merge it.

Here is an old "poem" of mine.


My Everything

My sky, my ground, my air
my star-grassy field
my bed, my pillow, my duvet
my flower-opener dawn
this is my everything

My night, my dream, my lights
my tale-teller steps
my miracle, my pearl, my desires
my wings closed into my eyes
this is my everything

And if I can hear your voice for a minute
if I can feel your kiss on my lips
These things are with me
because you are all - my everything



Thank you for your care to come here.
I will send more later with pleasure.


And for Jean's sake, the real one in Hungarian.


Mindenem

Egem, földem, levegőm
Csillag füves legelőm
Ágyam, párnám, paplanom
Virág nyitó hajnalom
ez mind az én Mindenem

Estém, álmom, fényeim
Mesét zengő lépteim
Csodám, gyöngyöm, vágyaim
Szemembe zárt szárnyaim
ez mind az én Mindenem

S ha percnyit Hangod hallhatom
Ha csókod érzem ajkamon
Ott van mindez én velem
Hisz Te vagy mind a Mindenem

vége

[Brice]

Yes, please do so.

[The_Nameless]

I certaintly hope that there are more to come.

[Jean]

Nikolett, thank you so much for having posted it!

:rose: :rose: :rose:

Could you please, whenever you post a poem that was originally written in Hungarian, provide the original version, too? Even if we don't read Hungarian, we can see how the lines are organized, what is the rhyming order, the alternation of long/short words, etc.

[Letti]

Thank you my friends. Thanks a million.

[Letti]

Nikolett, thank you so much for having posted it!

:rose: :rose: :rose:

Could you please, whenever you post a poem that was originally written in Hungarian, provide the original version, too? Even if we don't read Hungarian, we can see how the lines are organized, what is the rhyming order, the alternation of long/short words, etc.

Done, dear Jean. :rose:

[ManOfWesternesse]

It's a great poem Letti, and none the worse for having been read before.
I'm not 'into' poetry in a big way at all - but when it's as simple & clean & straightforward as this I can like it.

[Letti]

Thank you, thank you Brian. :rose:

[Matt]

Great stuff Letti. :blush:

[John Blaze]

Great stuff Letti, i only wish I knew hungarian so I could enjoy this in it's pure form.

[Letti]

Great stuff Letti, i only wish I knew hungarian so I could enjoy this in it's pure form.

I wish I knew English more and I could express myself as much as in Hungarian.
But mother tongue is mother tongue.

[Letti]

Love me
(to my Moon)

Love me just because - without causes
Love me because I do exist
Our love is being built slowly
Our treasure is saved by my hands

Love me often itty-bitty
Just sometimes love me very much
My soul drinks from your eyes
and if it's too greedy - I let it be

Love me in silence, softly
Smile at me with your desired lips
Our hot silence fights with noice
and asks you to love me more

And if flew too high
if I asked you too much
Please know: the biggest present is
that I may love you

Don't love me
let me love you




In Hungarian:

Szeress
(Holdamhoz)

Szeress csak úgy, okok nélkül
Szeress azért, mert létezem
Szerelmünk így lassan épül
Kincsünk őrzi két kezem

Szeress sokszor ici-picit
Csupán néha szeress nagyon
Lelkem Szemedből iszik
S hogyha mohó, reá hagyom

Szeress néma csendben, halkan
Kívánt Száddal, most rám nevess
Izzó csendünk küzd a zajjal
És arra kér, hogy még szeress

És ha túl magasra szállnék
Ha Tőled túl sokat kérek
Tudd: a legnagyobb ajándék
Hogy én szerethetlek Téged

Ne szeress,
hadd szeresselek én

[John Blaze]

i really realli like this one. It rhymed in hungarian though, didn't it?

[Letti]

i really realli like this one. It rhymed in hungarian though, didn't it?

Oh yes it did. A lot.
I worked on it a lot.


Thank you for the kind words. :rose:

[Letti]

Here is one... which is okay in English. Just okay.


Behind my blue eyes

Behind my blue eyes
Among such nice lines
over the smiles
storms are living

Behind my desires
Among my pearl-words
Nobody sees
but I break into tears

Behind my face
Among the faiths
sometimes I don't know
who I am

My mistakes can't but my
tears can be hidden
by my soft hair
Please accept me
to make me able to
accept myself

[John Blaze]

touching Letti, just ::tears UP::

ok, i really liked this one. I found myself singing it in my head. I think it would make a good song.

[ManOfWesternesse]

Blue Eyes is very good. English may not be your first language but you do very well in it. I wonder (and I may be way off the mark) do I like it because it's not written in your first language, which keeps the language simple while expressing complex thoughts?
(As I've said before - generally speaking I'm not at all a lover of Poetry - and so probably a poor critic as well). - Anyway - I like what I like, and I love this.

[Letti]

Blue Eyes is very good. English may not be your first language but you do very well in it. I wonder (and I may be way off the mark) do I like it because it's not written in your first language, which keeps the language simple while expressing complex thoughts?
(As I've said before - generally speaking I'm not at all a lover of Poetry - and so probably a poor critic as well). - Anyway - I like what I like, and I love this.

Thank you, Brian.
When I write a poem in Hungarian I usually use very simple pictures words and expressions to describe what I would like to say or show.
It's simple because it's simple in Hungarian as well.
It's my style if I have any.

thank you again :rose:

[ManOfWesternesse]

[QUOTE=Letti;6320]
It's my style if I have any.
QUOTE]

Oh you've got style Letti, there's none of us in any doubt about that!:wub:
Now back to the poetry:P

[Jean]

Oh you've got style Letti, there's none of us in any doubt about that!:wub:

hear, hear!

[Letti]

:blush:

[Letti]

Something short:

Perfect

Vases break
Loves fade
And one day even the light-giver bulb
reaches its last hours

Nothing can be prefect forever
just those things
that can never be ours

[Jon]

You are as beautiful with words as you are in pictures!

I love the poems!

[Jon]

http://i9.photobucket.com/albums/a58/jonbug/oliver-twist.jpg


More plesae?

[Letti]

http://i9.photobucket.com/albums/a58/jonbug/oliver-twist.jpg


More plesae?

*tries not to look into those eyes...* :D

[Jean]

but surely you won't answer him, "He asked for more after he had eaten his supper?!!" You will post more, won't you, sweetheart?

[Jon]

How can you deny sweet Oliver's face?

[Letti]

Thanks guys but I don't really have more in English. Cry your pardon. :D

[Letti]

Okay. I'll send a new one because I see people have stopped sending one ones.. maybe if I do...

here you are (it's not such a pleasure to show it because it's quite clumsy in English:


Even so

Maybe the fairy-tales talked about something esle
and the nice stories were not telling about this
even so it's love
And although it doesn't tear stars from the hot evening sky
it makes a rose spring on m'heart

It doesn't promise eternal happiness
or a perfect-painted past
when I recall it
even so the yesterday and tomorrow
can get a meaning
when my moon-armed knight hugs me

The sky doesn't fall on me
when he smiles at me or touches
I just shiver in silence
When I realise that he does exist
I am happy for a moment
and all the details fall into darkness

Maybe the tales promised something else
or the placats were not advertising this
even so it's love
Everything is so simply beautiful:
in the dark.. star-wagons..
in the silence.. a sound whispers...
and the people are people...
and the rain strokes the world...
because it springs a rose on m'heart

[Steve]

Nice work!

Final grade: A-

[Letti]

Nice work!

Final grade: A-

*hugs you* I feel as if I were at a school. :D

[Steve]

I try and do that with all the stories. If only people would for mine . . .

[Letti]

Thank you Steve but I couldn't give grades to poems or short stories not even if I wanted to. I really cry your pardon. I can't describe anything with them.. numbers and letters.
See?

[parsnip]

Something short:

Perfect

Vases break
Loves fade
And one day even the light-giver bulb
reaches its last hours

Nothing can be prefect forever
just those things
that can never be ours


I am absolutely loving all of your work, this one and Even So being two of my already favorites. You have such a frank yet romantic style. Your work is beautiful and gripping. I am very much looking forward to reading more whenever you translate and post them. Many thank you's for sharing these and pleases for more.

[Letti]

Oh thanks a million, parsnip. Your kind words made my whole weekend.
Thanks a lot.

[Jon]

I love it Letti!

[Letti]

Of course I don't think it is a poem but I had a feeling and I started to play with the words.
And here is it:

Dreaming

Sometimes in the dark
sitting alone
in our nice
but not perfect life
We start to dream
..faces appear

Pictures..
About something else
about something more
Voices are coming and go
Inside worlds fall
Desires grow

Suddenly
there is no more
but the only one
who I don't know
but I can hear
and I can feel

My mind gives him a face
it fills my soul
His soft wrinkles
his foxy fingers
his perfect smiles..
are my perfect lies

He touches me
he kisses me
he pulls me close
But throught the thin walls
I can see the lies
with my closed eyes

It's hard to speak
but the feeling comes
like a cold
untouchable knife
- I want back
my not perfect life

[Storyslinger]

I'm moved
That is a great peice of writting, I may have to watch my back in the writing world
your writing is better, plus your betterer looking
You got two up on me

[Letti]

Oh... thanks. I didn't even dare to hope to get such a nice opinion. :rose:

[Storyslinger]

Why, this is great stuff, you deserve a hug :couple:

[Letti]

I do deserve a hug (I need one, heh) but not because of this stuff. :couple:

[Storyslinger]

Then I give you a hug for the reason that you need it:couple::huglove:

[Jon]

I love the scheme dear angel!

[Letti]

I hardly ever wrtie "poems" in English but tonight I tried to put a feeling into one.
I know there is nothing new or original in it... but still. :)


Love me tonight

I wish
you loved me tonight
Please, come here
turn off the light
There's nothing else
but you and me
There's nothing here
that's worth to see

Pull me close
and kiss my hand
You're hot rain
I am your land
Let's break dark
and shine like suns
I burn inside
I've aching lungs

Single touch
What I'm crying for
my every cell
is a trembling door
Please forget now
what's bad or right
Just come
and love me tonight

[Ikilledthecrimsonking]

wow these are amazing poems Letti

[Jon]

you write true angel!

[alinda]

Truely :rose: wonderous Letti, just like you!

[ladysai]

Lovely work, Letti!
:huglove:

I liked this best in 'Dreaming':
My mind gives him a face
it fills my soul
His soft wrinkles
his foxy fingers
his perfect smile..
are my perfect lies

and this in 'Love Me Tonight':
Single touch
What I'm crying for
my every cell
is a trembling door
Please forget now
what's bad or right
Just come
and love me tonight


Goodstuff, lovely lady.
:)

[Letti]

How many kind responds. *smiles* Thank you all.

[ManOfWesternesse]

Dreaming

He touches me
he kisses me
he pulls me close
But throught the thin walls
I can see the lies
with my closed eyes


:clap: Very good Letti. I don't know how you (and others) can 'create' like that - it's a wonderful gift.

[Storyslinger]

I hardly ever wrtie "poems" in English but tongiht I tried to put a feeling into one.
I know there is nothing new or original in it... but still. :)


Love me tonight

I wish
you loved me tonight
Please, come here
turn off the light
There's nothing else
but you and me
There's nothing here
that's worth to see

Pull me close
and kiss my hand
You're hot rain
I am your land
Let's break dark
and shine like suns
I burn inside
I've aching lungs

Single touch
What I'm crying for
my every cell
is a trembling door
Please forget now
what's bad or right
Just come
and love me tonight

Simply Amazing my dear

[Letti]

Thank you my friends.

[Jon]

"A picture is worth a thousand words."

Letti's word are worth a million pictures.

[Letti]

One I translated from Hungarian so... I can hope the message can get there.


Face

Your beautiful eyes are looking at me
I see your smiling face
I can hug you again like a loving tree

On our face we wear our fate
On our face we wear what hurts
On our face we wear who we were
On our face we wear the pain of our heart

Love, don't hide your eyes, their beauty is great
God.. you are so wonderful
Your soul is dancing on your face

















And in Hungarian:

Arc

Szép szemed most rám tekint
látom mosolygó arcod
Büszkén ölelhetlek megint

Arcunkon hordjuk a sorsunk
Arcunkon hordjuk mi fáj
Arcunkon hordjuk kik voltunk
Arcunkon hordjuk a szívünk baját

Szép szemed kezedbe rejted
Istenem, de csodszép vagy..
Arcodon táncol a lelked

[LadyHitchhiker]

Letti... you are our everything.

[Jean]

hear, hear! http://i91.photobucket.com/albums/k291/mishemplushem/Facilitation/bear_wub.gifhttp://i91.photobucket.com/albums/k291/mishemplushem/Facilitation/bear_wub.gifhttp://i91.photobucket.com/albums/k291/mishemplushem/Facilitation/bear_wub.gif

[Steve]

Indubitably, she is.

[Letti]

How can you all be so kind? :wub:
Thank you.

[Storyslinger]

One I translated from Hungarian so... I can hope the message can get there.


Face

Your beautiful eyes are looking at me
I see your smiling face
I can hug you again like a loving tree

On our face we wear our fate
On our face we wear what hurts
On our face we wear who we were
On our face we wear the pain of our heart

Love, don't hide your eyes, their beauty is great
God.. you are so wonderful
Your soul is dancing on your face

















And in Hungarian:

Arc

Szép szemed most rám tekint
látom mosolygó arcod
Büszkén ölelhetlek megint

Arcunkon hordjuk a sorsunk
Arcunkon hordjuk mi fáj
Arcunkon hordjuk kik voltunk
Arcunkon hordjuk a szívünk baját

Szép szemed kezedbe rejted
Istenem, de csodszép vagy..
Arcodon táncol a lelked

I love this

[Letti]

Nothing speciel guys, it jumped out from my mind this morning:


I would like to be...

I would like to be a bird
to sit on your shoulder
I would like to be the wind
to bring you smells and wonder
I would like to be a song
to dance in your ears
I would like to be the rain
to give your face stroking tears

I would like to be the Moon
to pour my shine in your eyes
I would like to be a temple
to give home to your cries
I would like to be the dawn
to create you the nicest dew
I would like to be a gal
to be loved by you

[Kevin]

Simply... :huglove:

[Brice]

Nothing speciel guys, it jumped out from my mind this morning:


I would like to be...

I would like to be a bird
to sit on your shoulder
I would like to be the wind
to bring you smells and wonder
I would like to be a song
to dance in your ears
I would like to be the rain
to give your face stroking tears

I would like to be the Moon
to pour my shine in your eyes
I would like to be a temple
to give home to your cries
I would like to be the dawn
to create you the nicest dew
I would like to be a gal
to be loved by you

simply beautiful


:wub:

This is one lucky damn person. :huglove:

[ManOfWesternesse]

Nothing speciel guys, it jumped out from my mind this morning......


Very special ! very beautiful.

[Jon]

I would expect such a beautiful poem from such a beautiful author.


*sigh*

[alinda]

Letti, your words are as beautiful as you

[Letti]

Thank you, thank you all. :rose:

:)

[Jean]

bump bump bump bump bump bump bump

[Letti]

bump bump bump bump bump bump bump

Darling, :rose: I wish I had spirit to write.

[The Lady of Shadows]

letti you have been able to capture a style i just cannot grasp. the ability to rhyme is so difficult. everything i write ends up sounding childish - and a bit like dr. seuss.

everything you write sounds like a wind blowing through the eaves of my soul.

i am quite simply in awe. can you tell me. do you write in hungarian and then translate or do you get the image of what you want to portray and it doesn't really matter what language it comes out in?

you are truly amazing.

[Letti]

Oh wow... thanks turtle, you made me a little bit speechless. *tries to pull herself together*
I used to write all my "poems" in Hungarian and after that I tried to translate them into English, I must say I didn't do a good job.
Anyway to rhyme is Hungarian is quite easy for me ... to show what I feel is incredibly hard. It's like cutting a window into a metal wall...

But I wrote the last two ones in English. You can feel it. They seem so... whole.
- Love me tonight
- I would like to be...
These two were written in English originally. They just came out I was quite suprised as well. :)

Thank you for the kind words, I don't deserve them but I do appreciate them. :rose:

[Letti]

Oh, let me correct myself Dreaming was written in English as well but I dislike it so much that first I didn't remember it. :rolleyes:

[The Lady of Shadows]

yes i see what you mean about the last two - the feeling of wholeness. but tell me please. . .what don't you like about dreaming? is it the same thing that jean doesn't care for in my work? that it doesn't have the rhyme scheme of a more traditional, what was the phrase he used?, formal poem?

i think dreaming is one of your best pieces. it really captures exactly what she (i dared not presume to say you) must have been feeling.

[Letti]

I am happy to hear you like Dreaming. I am not satisfied with it at all. It could have been much better. But it was my first "poem" in English and I didn't believe in myself. So when I finished it I put down the pen and I said - it's bearable.
But when you would like to show or share a feeling "bearable" is miles from enough. So I don't like it because I could have put much more in it if I had trusted myself.
Now I cannot rewrite it because that feeling flew away and I can't grab it anymore.
There are feelings that are in your soul all the time - for example I could write I would like to be... anytime because I always feel it - but there are feelings that suddely appear to shake your inside world and you can hardly touch them to write them down. Love me tonight and Dreaming are about these always fleeing feelings. So I can't make them better I can't rewrite them.

[The Lady of Shadows]

i understand completely. you write about it when it demands to be written, when the feeling overpowers your soul - or it's gone forever. and you'd better hope when you're done it's good (or good enough) because once it's over it's really over.

that's why jean's topic in the francois villon thread took me completely off-guard. what i came up with didn't fit in there at all but it demanded to be written. and if i hadn't i probably would never have been able to again.

[Letti]

If you must write you must write. There is no choice.
You must know it. :)

[The Lady of Shadows]

as do you or you wouldn't produce such beautiful pieces of heart. :couple

[Letti]

... thank you ... :blush:

[cozener]

Love me tonight

I wish
you loved me tonight
Please, come here
turn off the light
There's nothing else
but you and me
There's nothing here
that's worth to see

Pull me close
and kiss my hand
You're hot rain
I am your land
Let's break dark
and shine like suns
I burn inside
I've aching lungs

Single touch
What I'm crying for
my every cell
is a trembling door
Please forget now
what's bad or right
Just come
and love me tonight

Ok...I don't know if this is appropriate to say (not that I've made a name for myself by being appropriate) but this poem actually got me hot...especially the stanza that had "you're hot rain, I am your land". I I've always found the woman/earth comparison a very alluring one...its almost like a literary fetish for me.

Then I tried to imagine it in Hungarian and I almost passed out.

[Letti]

Love me tonight

I wish
you loved me tonight
Please, come here
turn off the light
There's nothing else
but you and me
There's nothing here
that's worth to see

Pull me close
and kiss my hand
You're hot rain
I am your land
Let's break dark
and shine like suns
I burn inside
I've aching lungs

Single touch
What I'm crying for
my every cell
is a trembling door
Please forget now
what's bad or right
Just come
and love me tonight

Ok...I don't know if this is appropriate to say (not that I've made a name for myself by being appropriate) but this poem actually got me hot...especially the stanza that had "you're hot rain, I am your land". I I've always found the woman/earth comparison a very alluring one...its almost like a literary fetish for me.

Then I tried to imagine it in Hungarian and I almost passed out.

I am happy to see that you caught the feeling of this one. ;)

[Jon]

Your beauty shows in your picture and in all of your works Letti.

[stone, rose, unfound door]

You really are talented, Letti! We're all waiting for some other piece of poetry that comes out of your pretty head and I hope you can READ some to me when I come (in Hungarian, that is since I really don't know how it sounds) :)

[Letti]

You really are talented, Letti! We're all waiting for some other piece of poetry that comes out of your pretty head and I hope you can READ some to me when I come (in Hungarian, that is since I really don't know how it sounds) :)

Damn we missed it. It doesn't matter because I don't think I would have dared to read any of them out loudly in front of you. :) I am not good at such things.
But thank you.

[Jon]

I cannot wait as well!

[Letti]

One line came to my mind and it didn't let me go. Like usually.
And here it is.
(If it doesn't make much sense I am really sorry. Not a very clear one.)



That's what we are

Lonely gates in the street
that can never forget
The key and the door
the perfect locket
that's what we are

Two broken magnets
always without peace
The birds from far away
and the desert trees
that's what we are

The tears of the girl
the cries of the boy
Shelters of the dreams
no one can destroy
that's what we are

Roses of the sister
wings of the brother
Two dwarf planets
always pulling each other
that's what we are

[Brice]

it's lovely, dear

[flaggwalkstheline]

quite a beautiful bit of writing:rock:

[Letti]

thank you two :rose:

[ManOfWesternesse]

That's beautiful Letti!

[Letti]

That's beautiful Letti!

Dear Brian, thanks a lot. *hug*

[Letti]

Run

Faces you have never seen
Books you have never read
Places you have never been
Words you have never said

People you have never hugged
Tears you have never had
Flowers you have never touched
Doves you have never fed

There are so many things
You have never done
Stop, breathe the world inside
It's worthless to run

[smcicr]

ref - that's what we are

loved this - reading the rest of the thread i'd say it's even more special as it's in a second language.

it's really pure and direct (which i like) and even though it's concise you still manage to paint some great pictures.

oh and from where i'm sat - you have no problem at all with clarity :D

thanks for sharing.

[Jean]

the second verse is a masterpiece

[Letti]

Thank you for your time and for your kindness.

(OMG Jean, did you really write that?!?!) Thank you.

[Brice]

Letti, I love it. :rose:

[rosie real]

oh, my hungarian princess. you touch my very soul. :couple:

[Jon]

The concept is brilliant. To put it in such words is, talent.

Thank you.


("Doves you have never fed" I love that line!!)

[Jean]

("Doves you have never fed" I love that line!!)
bears' favorite line, too