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Letti
02-25-2008, 02:27 PM
* Spoilers all around!!! *


Okay.
I know you guys have a big imagination so let your mind fly.
What would be the worst/most weird ending ever?

Here is my and R_of_G's entry:
At the top of the Tower Roland ends up in a McDonalds and when if he supersizes it, he has to do the loop again.


(R of G, I can't stop laughing...)

jayson
02-25-2008, 02:34 PM
i'm glad i made you laugh Letti. roland trying to order in McD's would be quite a sight i am sure.


not sure how specific i can be, but i would have not liked any kind of "happy ending" where everybody makes it to the Tower in one piece and they all climb up together to meet Gan and save the Universe once and for all and then they all have an ice cream party with all their dead relatives and friends. i MUCH prefer the ambiguous bittersweet ending that just leads to more questions.

Letti
02-25-2008, 02:39 PM
I see where you are coming from.
I don't mind a "happy ending" if it's not perfect.

jayson
02-25-2008, 02:43 PM
i don't mind happy endings when they are realistic, but not when they are forced and every character gets a happy ending. i hate reading about eddie and jake and oy dying, but at the same time, i'm glad that they did as far as the story goes.

Letti
02-25-2008, 02:47 PM
(I see, that's why I didn't like the part where Susannah is leaving Roland...)

Another weird ending:
Roland finds Chuck Norris at the top of the Tower and they start to fight...

fernandito
02-25-2008, 03:02 PM
Roland enters the top of the tower and winds up as an extra in the Thriller video.

Letti
02-25-2008, 03:04 PM
Roland enters the top of the tower and winds up as an extra in the Thriller video.

Is that a movie?

fernandito
02-25-2008, 03:05 PM
Roland enters the top of the tower and winds up as an extra in the Thriller video.

Is that a movie?

Two words sweetie:


Micheal Jackson. :D

jayson
02-25-2008, 03:06 PM
it may as well be a movie. it was a 15 minute zombie dance video by michael jackson. zombie roland dancing the commala behind michael - very funny visual there fev! :lol:

jayson
02-25-2008, 03:08 PM
http://i26.tinypic.com/2q2oa5j.jpg

Letti
02-25-2008, 03:10 PM
Oh...
my...
God...

*laughs*
It is wild!

jayson
02-25-2008, 03:14 PM
when i was 13 it was on tv ALL the time.

Letti
02-25-2008, 03:18 PM
And weren't you afraid of it?

Irish~Rose
02-25-2008, 05:12 PM
Roland gets to the top of the tower and there's a not saying 'fooled ya'...

Okay that was crap lol but I tried!

jayson
02-25-2008, 05:20 PM
And weren't you afraid of it?

i was afarid it would never end. other than that, no. i think zombies are funny, not scary.

Erin
02-25-2008, 05:42 PM
Worst ending ever:

Roland gets to the top of the tower, turns the door-knob......and wakes up...It was all just a dream.

:dies:

Bethany
02-25-2008, 05:54 PM
Roland gets to the top of the tower and there's a not saying 'fooled ya'...

Okay that was crap lol but I tried!

BOOL!
THE END!

Woofer
02-25-2008, 06:50 PM
I second "it was all a dream" and throw in, via slashes, "it all took place in virtual reality or a video game" and "he was dead all along". Urgh!

Sai Joshua
02-25-2008, 07:33 PM
Roland opens the door at the top of the Tower and steps out onto the set of "The Oprah Winfrey Show" where he jumps up and down on the couch dancing the commala and screaming " I love Susan Delgado" at the top of his lungs.

Hell comes in many different forms!

Letti
02-25-2008, 10:02 PM
Worst ending ever:

Roland gets to the top of the tower, turns the door-knob......and wakes up...It was all just a dream.

:dies:

It really is horrible.


Roland opens the door at the top of the Tower and steps out onto the set of "The Oprah Winfrey Show" where he jumps up and down on the couch dancing the commala and screaming " I love Susan Delgado" at the top of his lungs.

It's even more horrible... *laughs*

Jean
02-26-2008, 12:54 AM
Roloand wakes up in a psychiatric clinic. A doctor with strong Austrian accent speaks to him softly and soothingly. We find out that it was all delirium of a LA cop who went mad after, being unable to solve the Gordian knot of neurotic inclinations and childhood inhibitions, aggravated by midlife crisis, he had shot half the population of a LA suburb.

His mother, Susannah, and his estranged son, Jake, are waiting for him in the lobby.

(I could go on but I might puke... sorry)

Allie
02-26-2008, 03:56 AM
it may as well be a movie. it was a 15 minute zombie dance video by michael jackson. zombie roland dancing the commala behind michael - very funny visual there fev! :lol:

I cant stop giggling at that mental picture!!

I think worst for me would be a super duper happy ending where all loose ends are tied up and everyone lives happily ever after. Blerk.

Allie
02-26-2008, 03:58 AM
I had a giggle to myself at the thought of Roland trying to order a popkin at MacDonalds too!

fernandito
02-26-2008, 05:48 AM
Roland opens the door at the top of the Tower and steps out onto the set of "The Oprah Winfrey Show" where he jumps up and down on the couch dancing the commala and screaming " I love Susan Delgado" at the top of his lungs.

Hell comes in many different forms!

:rofl:

:clap:

Nix_Toren
02-26-2008, 06:30 AM
Roland opens the door...

...and finds himself inside a wardrob full of old musty fur coats. He pushes through the coats (see where this is going yet?)...

and finds himself in Narnia. Then Lucy Pevensie and Mr Tumnus show up and poor Roland's like this :scared:.

mia/susannah
02-26-2008, 08:25 AM
http://i26.tinypic.com/2q2oa5j.jpg

Yes, I cna just imagine Roland doing the Commala Come dance to this song, standing beside or behiond Micheal Jackson.:rofl:

Letti
02-26-2008, 08:29 AM
Roland opens the door and Micky Mouse is playing with Pluto at the outher side and when he sees Roland he cries out: "Hey fella! Would you like to play with us? Come on, buddy!"

jayson
02-26-2008, 08:32 AM
Roland opens the door and Micky Mouse is playing with Pluto at the outher side and when he sees Roland he cries out: "Hey fella! Would you like to play with us? Come on, buddy!"

...and then Roland opens fire on Mickey

Nix_Toren
02-26-2008, 08:35 AM
Roland opens the door...

and Ashton Kutcher jumps out, yelling "Punk'd!".

Roland looks at him in horrified disbelief, takes out one of his guns, and shoots Ashton in the head.

jayson
02-26-2008, 08:39 AM
well at least you don't want Kutcher to play Eddie like some folks have suggested. i'd rather see Roland shoot him

Nix_Toren
02-26-2008, 09:01 AM
well at least you don't want Kutcher to play Eddie like some folks have suggested. i'd rather see Roland shoot him

As would I.

Ashton Kutcher as Eddie... urgh *shudder* He'd ruin it.

Letti
02-26-2008, 09:02 AM
R, you can always find out something even more terrible... *laughs*

Storyslinger
02-26-2008, 09:17 AM
Roland reaching the top of the tower, then noticing he dropped something.

He bends over, trips, falls down the flight of steps and dies.


Damn, that would suck.

Ryan
02-26-2008, 09:41 AM
Roland steps through the door....
Bright light blinds his eyes and he stumbles on the hardpan, loosing his balance and falls. His hands reach out to catch himself but only right arm manages out. His left arm gets caught on the strap of the horn of Eld. He sees clearly the tiny corner of the rock jutting out of the hardpan aimed at his temple. There's no stopping the momentum. The last thing he hears is the dull thud and crack of his skull on the rock. His eyes roll back as a pool of blood gathers around is long dark hair. Our view closes in on his dry cracked lips puffing up the dessert dust as he mutters - My life for your crops. :rose:

LadyHitchhiker
02-26-2008, 02:41 PM
When Roland steps out of the door at the top of the tower, he finds a room full of zombies and lets their plague out into the world, turned into a zombie himself...

Roland steps out of the door of the tower, and comes to a half-buried statue of a lady with a torch in her hand.

Gorillas are riding horses around him.

"DAMN YOU DIRTY APES!!! DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!" he screams in agony...

Roland winning some kind of reality tv show and him not knowing he was on it.. that would be funny...

jayson
02-26-2008, 02:44 PM
Roland steps out of the door of the tower, and comes to a half-buried statue of a lady with a torch in her hand.

Gorillas are riding horses around him.

"DAMN YOU DIRTY APES!!! DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!" he screams in agony...

"oh my gosh, i was wrong, it was earth all along... no you'll never make a monkey out of me" [The Simpsons - Planet of the Apes the Musical]

LadyHitchhiker
02-26-2008, 02:46 PM
I :wub: The Simpsons...

LadyHitchhiker
02-26-2008, 02:47 PM
Roland steps through the door and as he does the whole world becomes animated... he is in the South Park World and is suddenly killed.

"Oh my God!" screams a boy in a little poof-ball hat. "You killed Roland!"

"You bastards!" screams a little Jewish boy.

And everyone laughs it off.

LadyHitchhiker
02-26-2008, 02:52 PM
Roland opens the door...

...and finds himself inside a wardrob full of old musty fur coats. He pushes through the coats (see where this is going yet?)...

and finds himself in Narnia. Then Lucy Pevensie and Mr Tumnus show up and poor Roland's like this :scared:.

I am dying from Laughter... that is GREAT...

How about he steps through the door and finds him in the land of muppets.. He finds himself on Sesamee Street.

Girlystevedave
02-26-2008, 07:44 PM
Roland enters the top of the tower and winds up as an extra in the Thriller video.

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Girlystevedave
02-27-2008, 08:42 AM
Roland opens the door to hear someone yell:
"Dodgeball."
He immediately feels the sting as a ball hits him in the face.
He realizes he has been thrown back into gym class in junior high.

Letti
02-27-2008, 09:13 AM
Roland opens the door and he sees this:

http://www.stephaniehaywood.com/uploads/my%20little%20pony.jpg

Storyslinger
02-27-2008, 09:13 AM
That would kill even the strongest man.

Brice
02-27-2008, 09:14 AM
:rofl:


No, Roland would kill himself.

Kevin
02-27-2008, 11:36 AM
sad ending: He opens the door and his father is standing there. He draws, and kills Roland. As Roland dies, he says 'you have forgotten the face of your father' or some similiar ilk.

not so sad: Goes through the door and here's some buxom blonde screaming 'IIINNDDDYY'. He follows in pursuit.

Telynn
02-27-2008, 06:41 PM
And weren't you afraid of it?

i was afarid it would never end. other than that, no. i think zombies are funny, not scary.

Plus it was Michael Jackson. In his pre-scary, almost normal looking days. Not a scary person back then.

Ok, let's see....

He opens the door and steps through, only to find it leads to the outside of the tower, as he falls he hears Walters voice saying "What out for that first step...."

Grillslinger
02-28-2008, 06:07 AM
Here's my ending...this goes back to right before the standoff at Algul Siento. They're getting ready. They give each other one last look before going to their positions to wait for the enemy. The hold the look for a moment, then turn and start walking. Suddenly, all of Algul Siento's residents turn on them, taking ALL OF THEM out, Bonnie and Clyde style. It's horrible. Messy. Bloody. They are torn to shreds by bullets. Then the shooting stops. As the smoke clears, we see a figure standing in front of the shooters, looking down at the remains of our friends.

It is Ted Brautigan, with a slight smile on his face.

sarah
02-28-2008, 08:19 AM
Roland opens the door at the top of the Tower and steps out onto the set of "The Oprah Winfrey Show" where he jumps up and down on the couch dancing the commala and screaming " I love Susan Delgado" at the top of his lungs.

Hell comes in many different forms!

:rofl:

:clap:


I'll second that :rofl: and add one more :rofl:



Roland opens the door and the Futurama gang is there waiting for him. He is now the new delivery guy for Planet Express. He has saved the tower and gets to finish out his years in space delivering for the Professor. :D

Ryan
02-28-2008, 09:18 AM
The knob won't turn.... The door won't budge.... He's trapped inside the tower to wander his rooms of ruin forevermore.

-OR-

As he opens the door the blinding light startles him and he stumbles back and falls 120 flights of stone stairs.... Glancing through the 3rd last door seeing the terrible grin in those floating red eyes. ('course, falling that many stairs, he'd be dead by then).

-OR-

He opens the door and walks into a hallway lined with red velvet drapes. He pulls one back to reveal passage into a room with crazy zig-zag tiles. Smooth jazz starts to play in the back ground. There's a red couch angled toward two red chairs. He sits on the couch as a midgit appears in one of the chairs next to Laura Palmer, who is seated in the other. In walks Laura's cousin who starts to scream like the devil. Laura joins in. The midget gets up laughing and starts to do a little dance. The whole scene drives him insaine and try as he might he never escapes the Black Tower.

blake316
02-28-2008, 09:24 AM
Roland opens the door and steps into an audition for the role as the cowboy in the Village People 'sorry I'm late'

Girlystevedave
02-29-2008, 02:22 PM
When Roland opens the door, he is greeted by this:











http://i37.photobucket.com/albums/e66/girlystevedave/SesameStreet-Group.jpg?t=1204323693

jayson
02-29-2008, 02:31 PM
Roland comes out here....

http://i26.tinypic.com/33m0ffc.jpg

LadyHitchhiker
02-29-2008, 04:03 PM
Roland opens the door and ends up in the sewers where giant talking turtles with various weapons live with a giant rat. They all know the art of nin-jah fighting and want to recruit Roland...

LadyHitchhiker
02-29-2008, 04:07 PM
Roland opens the door and on the other side he sees a mirror. In the mirror he sees this picture: http://i129.photobucket.com/albums/p237/Lettike/IMG_0002.jpg
To the left he sees a crazy lady who looks like this:
http://photo.ringo.com/199/199868026O682921441.jpg drawing more 2-dimensional characters of he and his cohorts.

"I have drawn your whole world... you weren't supposed to find the way to my world this quickly" she says before tearing his picture in half, making his consciousness disappear....

Letti
02-29-2008, 11:10 PM
Roland comes out here....

http://i26.tinypic.com/33m0ffc.jpg

How did you do this? *laughs out loudly*

Jean
02-29-2008, 11:23 PM
yes, I think it takes the biscuit...

jayson
03-01-2008, 04:27 AM
Roland comes out here....

http://i26.tinypic.com/33m0ffc.jpg

How did you do this? *laughs out loudly*

if you go to the address on the bottom of the pic www.atom.smasher.org you can find the place where i was able to make this and make your own wheel of fortune puzzle.

obscurejude
03-01-2008, 10:48 PM
Jayson, that's clever as hell. Thank you sir.

sarah
03-02-2008, 07:31 AM
Jayson, :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Storyslinger
03-03-2008, 09:45 AM
Roland comes out here....

http://i26.tinypic.com/33m0ffc.jpg

Thats great

LadyHitchhiker
04-20-2008, 01:05 PM
*bumpety bump.. my life for you*

thankeesai
04-27-2008, 05:46 AM
He opens the door and is onstage Broadway as a dancer for "Spamalot". He starts doing the commala behind Clay Aiken and ends up kicking him into one of the balconies. The Claymates in the audience go beserk and he's forced to mesmerize them all with his bullet trick. Meanwhile, Clay is still hanging from the balcony by his underwear.

Cry your pardon if you are a Broadway, Clay Aiken, or Spamalot fan and this scenario has offended thee

obscurejude
04-27-2008, 11:49 AM
Thank you for that thankeesai. Very descriptive and aesthetically appealing. I really enjoyed it. :thumbsup:

thankeesai
04-27-2008, 03:21 PM
thanks! glad you liked it :cowboy:

/k/ommando
04-27-2008, 07:15 PM
He opens the door and comes across... 4chan. Somehow it is the bunghole of the multiverse as well as the bunghole of the internet.

Letti
04-28-2008, 01:44 PM
Roland opens the door and Jack Bauer is waiting for him at the other side and shoots him immedaitely because Jack thinks he is a damn dangerous terrorist.

Storyslinger
04-29-2008, 08:52 AM
Roland opens the door and Jack Bauer is waiting for him at the other side and shoots him immedaitely because Jack thinks he is a damn dangerous terrorist.

*snort* :rofl:

Letti
04-30-2008, 01:38 PM
What about having such a person at the other side?

http://i101.photobucket.com/albums/m60/oscorlortor/david-hasselhoff-07.jpg

Girlystevedave
04-30-2008, 01:39 PM
:rofl: :rofl:
That was scary enough for me!

Letti
04-30-2008, 01:43 PM
:lol:

LadyHitchhiker
04-30-2008, 03:15 PM
THANK YOU LETTI FOR BRINGING THE HOFF BACK!!!!!!!!!

*bows to the grandeur of Letti*

skoldpadda
05-26-2008, 09:47 PM
"Oh, you're probably looking for the dark tower, huh? Don't feel bad, common mistake. this is actually the semi-dark tower. The one you're looking for is back in Fedic..."

and then the book ends anyway

LadyHitchhiker
05-27-2008, 01:00 PM
Rambo comes out and duels with Roland....

Letti
05-27-2008, 11:47 PM
Rambo comes out and duels with Roland....

:thumbsup:

Ves'Ka Gan
05-29-2008, 11:21 PM
I have nothing to add to this thread at the moment, but really wanted to be included. My roommate officially thinks I am crazy because I am laughing out loud thinking of Roland accosted by an army of My Little Ponies.

Frunobulax
05-29-2008, 11:23 PM
AAAAAAHHHH GET TO DA CHOPPA!!!!!!!!!!

Letti
05-29-2008, 11:29 PM
I have nothing to add to this thread at the moment, but really wanted to be included. My roommate officially thinks I am crazy because I am laughing out loud thinking of Roland accosted by an army of My Little Ponies.
*laughs out loudly* Yeah, just think of the expression on Roland's face..

Letti
05-29-2008, 11:38 PM
Roland opens the door and Micky Mouse is playing with Pluto at the outher side and when he sees Roland he cries out: "Hey fella! Would you like to play with us? Come on, buddy!"

...and then Roland opens fire on Mickey

This one is priceless..


Roland opens the door at the top of the Tower and steps out onto the set of "The Oprah Winfrey Show" where he jumps up and down on the couch dancing the commala and screaming " I love Susan Delgado" at the top of his lungs.

Hell comes in many different forms!
This one is still killing me... *can't stop laughing*

LadyHitchhiker
05-30-2008, 04:32 AM
Roland steps through the door of the tower into the land of the carebears.

They decide to adopt him, killing his gunslinger heart with sunshine.

His new name is Roro.

He is the cutest cuddly cowboy in the world...

LadyHitchhiker
05-30-2008, 04:36 AM
Roland walks through the door and sees...

Martha Stewart.

The Lady of Shadows
05-30-2008, 10:27 AM
Roland walks through the door and sees...

Martha Stewart.

and promptly shoots her with every bullet he has left. then beats her over the head with the horn of eld all the while singing "ding dong the witch is dead, which ol' witch, the wicked witch, ding dong the wicked witch is dead"

MrsSmeej
05-30-2008, 10:51 AM
Roland approaches the Dark Tower but is stopped by a mysterious stranger. "What is your name?", asks the figure. "Roland Deschain, he of the Eld," replies Roland. "What is your quest?", continues the voice. "To climb to the top of the Dark Tower", replies Roland. "And, what is the average wing velocity of an English sparrow?"... "Ahhhhhhhh...." :D

The Lady of Shadows
05-30-2008, 11:23 AM
Roland approaches the Dark Tower but is stopped by a mysterious stranger. "What is your name?", asks the figure. "Roland Deschain, he of the Eld," replies Roland. "What is your quest?", continues the voice. "To climb to the top of the Dark Tower", replies Roland. "And, what is the average wing velocity of an English sparrow?"... "Ahhhhhhhh...." :D

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

LemurJones
05-30-2008, 12:34 PM
Roland opens the door... and steps through a portal, into a strange, blank room with no doors or windows...

And then he hears a voice...

"Unbelievable! You, [Subject Name Here] must be the pride of [Subject Hometown Here]!"

LadyHitchhiker
05-30-2008, 01:29 PM
Roland walks through the door and sees...

Martha Stewart.

and promptly shoots her with every bullet he has left. then beats her over the head with the horn of eld all the while singing "ding dong the witch is dead, which ol' witch, the wicked witch, ding dong the wicked witch is dead"

Nice job...

BillyxRansom
05-30-2008, 03:50 PM
Roland opens the door at the top of the Tower and steps out onto the set of "The Oprah Winfrey Show" where he jumps up and down on the couch dancing the commala and screaming " I love Susan Delgado" at the top of his lungs.

Hell comes in many different forms!

also, this:


Roland approaches the Dark Tower but is stopped by a mysterious stranger. "What is your name?", asks the figure. "Roland Deschain, he of the Eld," replies Roland. "What is your quest?", continues the voice. "To climb to the top of the Dark Tower", replies Roland. "And, what is the average wing velocity of an English sparrow?"... "Ahhhhhhhh...." :D

TIE.

[/THREAD]

The Lady of Shadows
05-30-2008, 03:53 PM
right as roland is getting ready to step through the door, regis philbin walks up and puts his hand on roland's arm. he says "now are you sure that's your final answer? you've still got one lifeline left. you could still call a friend."

LadyHitchhiker
05-30-2008, 03:54 PM
Roland approaches the Dark Tower but is stopped by a mysterious stranger. "What is your name?", asks the figure. "Roland Deschain, he of the Eld," replies Roland. "What is your quest?", continues the voice. "To climb to the top of the Dark Tower", replies Roland. "And, what is the average wing velocity of an English sparrow?"... "Ahhhhhhhh...." :D

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

This killed me

but I would like Roland to go through the door and suddenly be on a quest with Indiana Jones.. but that wouldnt' be the worst ending ever. Incongruent, yes.. badly horrible, no.

LadyHitchhiker
05-30-2008, 03:54 PM
I would also like him to walk out onto the stageshow part of Rocky Horror Picture Show and join in dancing iwth them.

Horrible ending...

LadyHitchhiker
05-30-2008, 03:55 PM
Orrrrrrrrrrrrr he could transform into a car and drive off into the sunset with the transformers theme song playing in the background...

shaggyamy
05-30-2008, 04:21 PM
Roland opens the door and there is another smaller door. He opens that door and there is yet again a smaller door. He opens that door crawls thru and now he's the Mad Hatter in Wonderland.

darkchar
05-30-2008, 08:30 PM
He walks through the door and finds he's been dreaming. None of it real. He'd been hypnotized by some crazy therapist with a sick sense of humor.

LadyHitchhiker
05-31-2008, 04:32 AM
Roland opens the door and there is another smaller door. He opens that door and there is yet again a smaller door. He opens that door crawls thru and now he's the Mad Hatter in Wonderland.

I like this one..

or he could be in wonkaland...

razz
05-31-2008, 04:51 AM
Roland reaches to top of the tower. and
1. trips, yells cut, and they have to do the whole thing over
2. there is a recording at the top that says
"Welcome to the Dark Tower. Are business hours are 6AM-9PM weekdays, 12PM to 6PM Saturdays, closed Sundays. As a customer, you are very important to use. please return during scheduled business hours. thank you, and goodnight."
3. he opens the door to Montel Williams Show, then watches a "This Is YOUR Life!" montage of his quest to the tune of Distubed's Stricken

Ves'Ka Gan
05-31-2008, 05:53 PM
Roland opens the door to see Paula Abdul, Randy (??last name??) and Simon Cowell sitting behind a card table. Paula is applauding while Simon rages 'You call that a quest?! That was amatuer at best, there is NO WAY you're going to Hollywood".

razz
05-31-2008, 05:56 PM
He opens the door and a bunch of streamers start falling to the sound of cheering. Then that guy from the World News broadcast walks in and says
"You just saved the Universe, what are YOU going to do next?!"

razz
06-01-2008, 04:58 AM
"...So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past."

Roland walks in on a dramatic reading of Great Gatsby. He is driven insane, and runs willingly into todash.

Ves'Ka Gan
06-01-2008, 10:12 AM
Razz--this one is for you (and anyone else lucky enough to appreciate it).

Roland walks through the door and there is a big blue box, Christopher Ecclestion is standing there and shouts "NOW RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!".

Letti
06-01-2008, 11:11 AM
When he opens the door...

http://i129.photobucket.com/albums/p237/Lettike/rolandmario.jpg

razz
06-01-2008, 02:06 PM
gets a T-shIrt that says
"I REACHED THE NEXUS OF THE UNIVERSE AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS STUPID FUCKING SHIRT!"

jayson
06-01-2008, 02:24 PM
that's an excellent one Razz :lol:

razz
06-01-2008, 02:26 PM
I'm full of 'em

The Lady of Shadows
06-01-2008, 02:45 PM
Roland reaches to top of the tower. and
<snip>
2. there is a recording at the top that says
"Welcome to the Dark Tower. Are business hours are 6AM-9PM weekdays, 12PM to 6PM Saturdays, closed Sundays. As a customer, you are very important to use. please return during scheduled business hours. thank you, and goodnight."
<snip>


:rofl:




Razz--this one is for you (and anyone else lucky enough to appreciate it).

Roland walks through the door and there is a big blue box, Christopher Ecclestion is standing there and shouts "NOW RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!".

:lol:

at least you said christopher eccleston and not the current loser playing the doctor. :)

razz
06-01-2008, 02:48 PM
at least you said christopher eccleston and not the current loser playing the doctor. :)
:o how dare you. How DARE You!

:cry:That's not nice!

The Lady of Shadows
06-01-2008, 02:55 PM
at least you said christopher eccleston and not the current loser playing the doctor. :)
:o how dare you. How DARE You!

:cry:That's not nice!


oh hey. you are paying attention. :P

razz
06-01-2008, 02:57 PM
so where have you been? you missed cake. it was rainbow.

The Lady of Shadows
06-01-2008, 03:46 PM
i see that. and i see that i'm gone one day and you start flirting with someone new. :lol:
fickle, fickle, fickle. :)

LadyHitchhiker
06-01-2008, 03:48 PM
I'll share cake with you, turtle!

or am I not turtley enough for the turtle club?

riknofx
06-01-2008, 03:54 PM
OK Ok I got ...... when he walks out.....:scared:





he has to start the journey all over again from the timeless opening line we all love so much....... oh ........ uh....... damn.....:o :|


JK

razz
06-01-2008, 03:55 PM
i see that. and i see that i'm gone one day and you start flirting with someone new. :lol:
fickle, fickle, fickle. :)

"I only have eeeeyes fooor youououououououououu"
turtle,turtle,turtle...
aren't you married?
:D

LadyHitchhiker
06-01-2008, 03:58 PM
OK Ok I got ...... when he walks out.....:scared:





he has to start the journey all over again from the timeless opening line we all love so much....... oh ........ uh....... damn.....:o :|


JK

:rofl:

You killed me with this... that and Letti's mario thing... :rofl:

razz
06-01-2008, 04:00 PM
OK Ok I got ...... when he walks out.....:scared:





he has to start the journey all over again from the timeless opening line we all love so much....... oh ........ uh....... damn.....:o :|


JK

was that opening line
"Roland, I need you to run over to the Dark Tower sprmrkt again, we're out of coffee!"

The Lady of Shadows
06-01-2008, 04:14 PM
I'll share cake with you, turtle!

or am I not turtley enough for the turtle club?

are you kidding me? part llama, part fox, part sarcasm, part . . .

sorry, totally lost my train of thought. i was watching the dancing nana and you know what, taken in the wrong light that guy is just really wrong. just sit and watch him sometime. oh, wait, where was i? oh yes. . .

part llama, part fox, part sarcasm, part sensitivity. you're in baby, you're in. :thumbsup:





i see that. and i see that i'm gone one day and you start flirting with someone new. :lol:
fickle, fickle, fickle. :)

"I only have eeeeyes fooor youououououououououu"
turtle,turtle,turtle...
aren't you married?
:D

yeah, but he's never read the tower. he's not even interested. so. . . . .

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk95/turtlesong/howyoudoin.gif

(j/k) :)

razz
06-01-2008, 04:19 PM
Roland sees this when he opens the door.

Ph34r 73h synkr0nyz3d 84n4n4 D4nc3!!!


:nana::nana::nana::nana::nana::nana::nana:

:nana::nana::nana::nana::nana::nana:
:nana::nana::nana::nana::nana:
:nana::nana::nana::nana:
:nana::nana::nana:
:nana::nana:
:nana:



sorry, couldn't resist.

razz
06-01-2008, 04:21 PM
worse than inmates dancing to Soulja Boy

razz
06-01-2008, 04:24 PM
compare

YouTube - Soulja Boy

Ves'Ka Gan
06-01-2008, 04:29 PM
A few points to make:

1) I love David Tennant as the Doctor, although I admit he brings a much different take on than Eccleston did.

2)one of my favorite pictures of the DT happens to have the TARDIS sitting off to the side a little--it was great and I thought I was going to die from the amount of geeking out I was doing...

and 3)Turtlesong--Song of the Turtle--what's the difference anyway?

The Lady of Shadows
06-01-2008, 04:29 PM
if roland saw that, i think he would renounce.

razz
06-01-2008, 04:35 PM
A few points to make:

1) I love David Tennant as the Doctor, although I admit he brings a much different take on than Eccleston did.

2)one of my favorite pictures of the DT happens to have the TARDIS sitting off to the side a little--it was great and I thought I was going to die from the amount of geeking out I was doing...

and 3)Turtlesong--Song of the Turtle--what's the difference anyway?

1. Eccleston was great but i think tennant rocks. especially because he's ruthless.
"No second chances.that's the kind of man I am"
2. where can i find that picture?

The Lady of Shadows
06-01-2008, 04:38 PM
A few points to make:

1) I love David Tennant as the Doctor, although I admit he brings a much different take on than Eccleston did.

2)one of my favorite pictures of the DT happens to have the TARDIS sitting off to the side a little--it was great and I thought I was going to die from the amount of geeking out I was doing...

and 3)Turtlesong--Song of the Turtle--what's the difference anyway?

1. lots of people do (see the doctor who thread(s)). i'm more of an eccleston kind of girl. :) that comment was meant specifically to draw razz's ire (he's so easy to bait). :P to razz (not you)

2. can you post the pic in the appropriate section? i'd love to see it! i think the whole concept of the tardis rocks! :geekturtle:

3. Song of the Turtle = what sai king is to listen for so that he knows it's time to begin the tale again; turtlesong = me :)

:rose:

razz
06-01-2008, 04:41 PM
Roland walks into the top room, and comes out here:

http://www.boxlessthoughts.com/images/blissTardis_desktop/BlissTardis.jpg
(http://www.boxlessthoughts.com/images/blissTardis_desktop/BlissTardis.jpg)

Ves'Ka Gan
06-01-2008, 04:55 PM
3. Song of the Turtle = what sai king is to listen for so that he knows it's time to begin the tale again; turtlesong = me :)

:rose:

I was making a comparison between our scrennames--Turtlesong=you. Ves'Ka Gan=song of the Turtle=me.:ninja:

::Off to search for TARDIS/Dark Tower picture.::

The Lady of Shadows
06-01-2008, 04:56 PM
3. Song of the Turtle = what sai king is to listen for so that he knows it's time to begin the tale again; turtlesong = me :)

:rose:

I was making a comparison between our scrennames--Turtlesong=you. Ves'Ka Gan=song of the Turtle=me.:ninja:

::Off to search for TARDIS/Dark Tower picture.::

i was trying not to let people know that we were the same people, just on different levels of the tower. now you've gone and given it away. :)

razz
06-01-2008, 04:58 PM
isn't that bad? like crossing the streams bad?
won't the paradox destroy 2/3 of the universe?

The Lady of Shadows
06-01-2008, 04:59 PM
roland, tired, alone but still pressing on, opens the door to the room at the top of the tower and suddenly finds himself:

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk95/turtlesong/rolandshighwaysign.jpg

razz
06-01-2008, 05:03 PM
:lol::lol:

Ves'Ka Gan
06-01-2008, 05:07 PM
Shit--I forgot to put a :spoiler: tag on it!

The Lady of Shadows
06-01-2008, 05:31 PM
isn't that bad? like crossing the streams bad?
<snip>

:rofl:mao

Ves'Ka Gan
06-01-2008, 05:37 PM
isn't that bad? like crossing the streams bad?
<snip>

:rofl:mao
:doh: I didn't even catch the Ghostbuster's reference til I read it the second time. Razz, I think I love you. Are you up for adoption?

razz
06-02-2008, 08:23 AM
not since 2002.

LadyHitchhiker
06-02-2008, 02:47 PM
But when do your parents go up for reelection?

SaiCmont19
06-02-2008, 04:36 PM
Roland gets to the tower, and just as he does someone pops out and says,

"The bad news is, this was all a dream. But I saved a bunch of money on my car insurance!"

Ves'Ka Gan
06-02-2008, 06:01 PM
I don't know why, but when I read that I invisioned Roland ranting "So easy a gunslinger could do it?!"

The Lady of Shadows
06-03-2008, 01:34 PM
ah, if only this were oy instead of a cat. :)

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk95/turtlesong/lolcats/geico.jpg

SaiCmont19
06-03-2008, 01:54 PM
Best post ever!!

Gieco would be owned by Oy :rofl:

razz
06-03-2008, 02:06 PM
kinda wouldn't fit tho.
"What? No, i can't save you money on car insurance? Who? No! That's Geico, not Billy-bumbler!

razz
06-05-2008, 05:52 PM
Roland reaches the top of the tower, and has to run back down because he's got diarrhea .

The Lady of Shadows
06-05-2008, 07:19 PM
he reaches the top, opens the door and sees:

drew carey in a tuxedo. overhead he hears a voice saying "roland deschain, come on down. you are the next contestant on the price is right."

theBeamisHome
06-06-2008, 04:04 AM
He never reaches the door at the top of the tower. He just walks up stairs around and around for another thousand years or so and dies of starvation on the way up.

Letti
06-06-2008, 11:29 PM
He never reaches the door at the top of the tower. He just walks up stairs around and around for another thousand years or so and dies of starvation on the way up.

Oh my... it takes the cookie.

ZGDK
06-07-2008, 08:20 AM
Roland opens the door at the top and finds out that there are billions of more tower representing the other multiverses. Then Roland commits suicide and ends up at the Way Station where Jake is chasing a man in black across the desert. Roland tries to kill himself again but realizes he is out of bullets. Then he screams.

LadyHitchhiker
06-08-2008, 05:42 AM
Roland reaches the top of the tower, and has to run back down because he's got diarrhea .
Probably my favorite one so far... that one and Mario

razz
06-08-2008, 05:49 AM
bathroom to the left

ZGDK
06-08-2008, 07:10 AM
Roland opens the door on the top and enters and now he's on Jerry Springer.

LadyHitchhiker
06-08-2008, 07:54 AM
:rofl:

Roland opens the door and finds himself in Wonka's chocolate factory...

Spencer
06-08-2008, 09:38 AM
He sees a fate worse than an endless loop:

http://img.inkfrog.com/pix/stancho/Richard_Simmons_Fitness_Guru_RARE_STUDIO_PROMO_Sig ned__522.jpg

razz
06-08-2008, 09:55 AM
:scared:
god kill me now

Brice
06-08-2008, 09:57 AM
Ok! :)


*stabs*

theBeamisHome
06-08-2008, 03:04 PM
:scared: that picture made my eyes water immediately no lie.

Ves'Ka Gan
06-08-2008, 04:17 PM
My heart jumped in my chest and screamed when it saw Richard Simmons standing there...

The Lady of Shadows
06-08-2008, 04:37 PM
okay, we can now close this thread. we have all been bested.

richard simmons

Ves'Ka Gan
06-08-2008, 04:49 PM
You're not daring me again, turtlesong...are you?

Ves'Ka Gan
06-08-2008, 04:54 PM
Roland opens the door and this guy is standing there, with copies of all his Christian self-help books. And he wants a hug.
http://i232.photobucket.com/albums/ee102/AjaxthePixie/262f_1.jpg

(I don't know why but the very sight of this guy creeps me the hell out!)

razz
06-08-2008, 05:20 PM
okay, we can now close this thread. we have all been bested.

richard simmons

is that a challenge?

razz
06-08-2008, 05:22 PM
Roland opens the door, and the man behind it says
"That blood on your shirt look NASTY! But it will wash right out with the power of...
http://cardiogirl.net/Graphics/BillyMays.jpg
OxyClean!

fernandito
06-08-2008, 06:56 PM
Roland opens the door, and the man behind it says
"That blood on your shirt look NASTY! But it will wash right out with the power of...
http://cardiogirl.net/Graphics/BillyMays.jpg
OxyClean!

:rofl:

Letti
06-08-2008, 09:11 PM
Roland would shoot those guys without any hesitation.

The Lady of Shadows
06-08-2008, 09:21 PM
you say true, i say thankya

theBeamisHome
06-09-2008, 04:41 AM
That guy does all the commercials for the clean up stuff... That orangy cleaner... the rag that soaks up ANYTHING!! Yeah he'd last two seconds before Roland destroyed him for the sake of his sanity.

LadyHitchhiker
06-13-2008, 05:40 AM
:rofl:

I'm dying I'm dying....

More more more!!!!!!

ZGDK
06-16-2008, 06:05 AM
Roland opens the door at the top of the tower and:

is back in junior high.

Letti
06-16-2008, 06:06 AM
Roland opens the door at the top of the tower and:

is back in junior high.

What a nightmare..

Ves'Ka Gan
06-19-2008, 07:08 PM
Roland opens the door at the top of the tower and is faced with this:
http://i232.photobucket.com/albums/ee102/AjaxthePixie/MARILYNMANSON-Mechanicalanimals-Fro.jpg
**shudders**

theBeamisHome
06-20-2008, 04:30 AM
i don't understand... does he not want to be human??

Ves'Ka Gan
06-20-2008, 01:33 PM
I try not to think about it.

I wouldn't even have posted it, but I was looking for a picture of the pink-clad police to post & couldn't find them--realized this picture is a much more accurate visualization of Hell than pink cops anyway.

LadyHitchhiker
06-21-2008, 01:11 PM
Wow... I wonder if that's what the Crimson King looks like...

Sam
06-21-2008, 01:59 PM
None of the Ka-Tet dies and they all reach the tower alive. They all go to the top, Eddie huffing and puffing from carrying Susannah. Roland pushes Jake to the ground, gets to the door first, and cries "Base! Not it!". Jake is understandably upset and draws his gun screaming "You cheated you little cheater!" Roland draws his gun as well. While Roland and Jake are distracted, Oy goes to the door and nudges it open. Everything dissolves into todash space.

Oy wakes up. Wow! That was a strange dream. He gets out of bed and kisses his husband Ake on the cheek. They had gotten married in Cali-for-nee just a week ago. Oh, it was so good to be married to Ake. He was a much better companion than Olan. Olan was obsessed with building some tower thing in his back yard. Oops, it was time to get ready for work. Vacation was over, back to the real world. Oy scratched his tail while he looked for his pants...

How's that for the worst ending?

razz
06-21-2008, 02:04 PM
:scared:

Letti
06-21-2008, 02:06 PM
Oy wakes up. Wow! That was a strange dream. He gets out of bed and kisses his husband Ake on the cheek. They had gotten married in Cali-for-nee just a week ago. Oh, it was so good to be married to Ake. He was a much better companion than Olan. Olan was obsessed with building some tower thing in his back yard. Oops, it was time to get ready for work. Vacation was over, back to the real world. Oy scratched his tail while he looked for his pants...

How's that for the worst ending?

Oh boy! You do have fantasy... :lol:

razz
06-21-2008, 02:07 PM
and what does that tell you about Mr. Catoe up thea?

Letti
06-21-2008, 02:21 PM
Roland opens the door aaand..
http://i129.photobucket.com/albums/p237/Lettike/towerSpringer.jpg

razz
06-21-2008, 02:22 PM
XD

Letti
06-21-2008, 02:24 PM
Look at the people in the background and think of Roland... ;)

The Lady of Shadows
06-21-2008, 02:24 PM
:lol:

"dirty tower secrets"

BASE! not it!

razz
06-21-2008, 02:28 PM
http://www.thedarktower.org/palaver/attachment.php?attachmentid=539&d=1214087303
#1 looks leik my German teacher
#2 reminds me of Children of the Korn
i swaer I saw #3 on Americas Most Wanted
and i Bet #4 hates the logo on his face. he ain't Mrs. Buttersworth

The Lady of Shadows
06-21-2008, 02:59 PM
Look at the people in the background and think of Roland... ;)


you know the first thing i thought of was susan, lovely girl at the window when i saw the girl sitting there head in hands. and two back from her (diag) is aileen, still not over losing roland. . .

ZGDK
06-22-2008, 11:11 AM
Roland opens the door at the top and comes back into reality. He is an overworked, underpaied costumer service rep who works at the bottom of a giant office tower. All his life he has wanted to climb to the top and become CEO. His wife Susan barley speaks English and she works at a laundromat. He is in his bedroom and hears Susan say: Roland I'm pregnant. It ends with Roland screaming.

Ves'Ka Gan
06-22-2008, 01:24 PM
Crap, Z--I think I worked there once....

LadyHitchhiker
06-23-2008, 11:31 AM
Roland walks through the door at the top of the tower, and sees a feeble looking man that looks like Eddie with large glasses. He looks quite undangerous. He looks with recognition to Roland and mumbles something about him taking his stapler, then takes out a flamethrower and charcoals Roland to a crisp. Oy and Jake run through and grab off bits and pieces of him to eat, as Susannah screams about being discriminated because there is no handicapped parking space.

THE END...

The Lady of Shadows
06-23-2008, 01:40 PM
roland opens the door and walks through to find

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk95/turtlesong/destroy%20game/flair2.jpg

"roland, we need to talk about your flair. now, 15 is the minimum number of pieces
of flair. is the minimum really all that you want to do?"

razz
06-23-2008, 04:30 PM
Right there, a gun wouldn't be enough. neither would killing that guy once

Babymordred121
06-25-2008, 02:49 PM
Roland gets to the top of the tower, and then, out of nowhere, he's teleported back through time and space to the beginning of the series and has to start the journey all over again.

Tee hee hee.

Babymordred121
06-25-2008, 02:56 PM
Roland walks into the room at the top of the Dark Tower, only to find out that Elvis Presley beat him to the punch. Roland finds out that the only way to defeat Elvis is in a guitar duel, and realizes that the loss of his fingers had been planned all along.

razz
06-25-2008, 06:50 PM
Roland reaches the door and encounters someone who gets there first. The person challenges him to a game of cards, and Roland accepts. After a dramatic game, he wins with this combo
http://a346.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/95/l_a2c063aa8a4b53caca51f38cc9cc7951.jpghttp://a897.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/10/l_f560f9b4731cba10bf22a5f7dd823848.jpg
A random person the bursts into the room, points at Roland and yells "NEEEEERD!!!"

Unfound One
06-25-2008, 06:53 PM
Hahaha, I like that Razz.

razz
06-25-2008, 07:16 PM
since i already did three of these, i think a maek a whole set.

The Lady of Shadows
06-25-2008, 07:29 PM
Roland reaches the door and encounters someone who gets there first. The person challenges him to a game of cards, and Roland accepts. After a dramatic game, he wins with this combo
http://a346.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/95/l_a2c063aa8a4b53caca51f38cc9cc7951.jpghttp://a897.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/10/l_f560f9b4731cba10bf22a5f7dd823848.jpg
A random person the bursts into the room, points at Roland and yells "NEEEEERD!!!"


:lol:

LadyHitchhiker
06-28-2008, 04:42 AM
roland opens the door and walks through to find

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk95/turtlesong/flair2.jpg

"roland, we need to talk about your flair. now, 15 is the minimum number of pieces
of flair. is the minimum really all that you want to do?"


:rofl:

You killed me!!!

ZGDK
06-28-2008, 08:47 AM
Roland opens the door at the top and finds himself in an old 90's commercial for the Sega Genesis. Roland is killed by the wonders of Blast Processing.

Matticus-Finch
07-11-2008, 03:14 PM
Roland enters the Tower only to be told to take a number and wait his turn.
The conclusion never follows...

Letti
07-12-2008, 12:44 AM
Roland enters the Tower only to be told to take a number and wait his turn.
The conclusion never follows...

It's the worst so far.
I mean it.

*dies*

Ves'Ka Gan
07-14-2008, 12:06 PM
Haha that reminds me of last weekend. I went with my boyfriend to the base barber's to get his haircut & he had to take a number, and he was number 70-something onthe second set, but they were still on 80 something of the first set, so we went walking around the mall area and checking back. We somehow missed his turn, had to take ANOTHER number and wait ANOTHER hour and a half for his hair cut.

made me think of poor Roland

razz
07-18-2008, 02:34 PM
>< that sucks

Fathers Face
07-18-2008, 07:37 PM
Roland walks through the field of roses The Dark Tower casting its Shadow down upon him he looks up at the sun set sky and draws in the smell of the Roses. His time has finally come he is at peace Roland reaches out his weary gun calloused hand.....Whats this a sign hanging form the door of The Dark Tower...Dark Tower is relocating please come and visit us at our new location in Lud expect delays if your are planning on catching the Mono Train don't forget your gas mask !

The Lady of Shadows
07-18-2008, 08:35 PM
:lol:

shades of chevy chase in vacation.

citiesburnred
07-18-2008, 09:08 PM
Roland walks into the tower and ends up in the the Dexy's Midnight Runners - Come On Eileen video playing the role of Eileen

The Lady of Shadows
07-18-2008, 09:19 PM
you know that was voted the number one video of all time on vh1. seriously - my husband bitches about it constantly. :rofl:

citiesburnred
07-18-2008, 09:25 PM
really? that's disappointing..I mean the songs not horrible but I really hate that video...especially their little dance..nevermind

LadyHitchhiker
07-20-2008, 02:41 AM
Roland walks into the tower and ends up in the the Dexy's Midnight Runners - Come On Eileen video playing the role of Eileen

That's actually one of my favorite songs of all time...

LadyHitchhiker
07-20-2008, 02:42 AM
Roland opens the door and sees...

Princess Leia. The weepy princess intones, "Help us Roland Deschain, you're our only hope."

Not another quest!!!!!

Letti
07-20-2008, 11:03 AM
Roland opens the door and sees...

Princess Leia. The weepy princess intones, "Help us Roland Deschain, you're our only hope."

Not another quest!!!!!

http://i129.photobucket.com/albums/p237/Lettike/smiley/coffee_spray.gif

LadyHitchhiker
07-22-2008, 03:36 AM
Roland Deschain opens the door

and walks out onto another beach.

Beautiful men and women in strange red suits run by in slow motion
http://blog.lib.umn.edu/raim0007/wost3307/Caroline-06_large.jpg

http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:6F0DRzPiittTIM:http://jakehemming.com/b/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/baywatch-300x299.jpg

and a confident but urgent man yells to Roland, "we need you out here! There are sharks in the water!"
http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:6v10KWdHbr6WLM:http://artfiles.art.com/images/-/David-Hasselhoff---Baywatch-Photograph-C10103337.jpeg

Stinga of A-Town
07-22-2008, 02:21 PM
Roland opens the door at the top of the tower and enters. In the middle of the room is a sack, moving and struggling. Upon opening the bag, he reveals a small, mushroom shaped creature, who say to him,

"THANK YOU ROLAND
BUT OUR PRINCESS IS IN
ANOTHER CASTLE."

Brice
07-22-2008, 02:25 PM
:lol:

razz
07-22-2008, 02:28 PM
:rofl:

razz
07-22-2008, 02:31 PM
it's sad when saiving the very fabric of existence amounts to nothing more than a side quest

Stinga of A-Town
07-22-2008, 02:41 PM
:D

razz
08-06-2008, 07:32 AM
http://i211.photobucket.com/albums/bb193/aredhel72/RolandChaoticGood.jpg

Empath of the White
08-14-2008, 10:09 PM
Roland reaches the landing and inhales the air. It is ancient yet seems to be charged with energy. The song that had always guided him, always sang to him from within the back of his mind, seemed to have been amplified tenfold. Slowly he walked the last stretch of the hall to the door. With a trembling hand he reached for the knob and immediately upon contact the song reached a defeaning crescendo.

The song of the rose. The song of the Tower. The song of the Turtle. Here they all converge. Here all chaos is drowned out with the hymn of reason.

Without a second's hesitation, Roland flung open the door and...

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/24/40211582_061dee45a7.jpg?v=0

Letti
08-14-2008, 10:19 PM
... and when he saw the cute creatures behind the door he hugged them one by one and joined them to sing.

razz
08-15-2008, 05:53 AM
:|
:|
:wtf:

Cuthbert Heath
08-19-2008, 01:18 PM
i figured through most of the story starting midway through wizard and the glass that its was going to be a dream and susannah was going to wake up with all the guys from the story around her in bed like the wizard of oz

stone, rose, unfound door
08-19-2008, 02:59 PM
Worst ending ever:

Roland gets to the top of the tower, turns the door-knob......and wakes up...It was all just a dream.

He wakes up to discover he's a civil servant working at the local post office.

LadyHitchhiker
08-19-2008, 03:09 PM
Roland turns the doorknob and...

falls down the rabbit hole .... meeting a strange young girl named Alice in a blue dress down at the bottom and a frantically time-consumed rabbit.

The Lady of Shadows
08-19-2008, 03:20 PM
Roland turns the doorknob and...

falls down the rabbit hole .... meeting a strange young girl named Alice in a blue dress down at the bottom and a frantically time-consumed rabbit.

then he shoots the rabbit, skins it to make a new gunna, sleeps with alice, and continues on his journey to find the dark tower.

razz
08-19-2008, 03:47 PM
he would do that too. he would then keep the rabbits watch to use to tell when he's close to the tower

TheMightyMonarch
09-05-2008, 06:47 PM
Roland opens the door and comes out in a hallway, where he sees the Scooby Doo gang being chased by a monster. He gets caught up in the chase and ends up going through all kinds of different doors. He eventually realizes that the chase is an endless loop and wonders what the heck just happened and goes back out the original door. He tries to open it again but it doesn't budge. He knocks on it and a panel near the top of the door is pushed out a bit and slid open to reveal a pair of beady eyes looking out at him. The person behind the door says "Who are you?"
Roland says "I'm Roland, and I'm here to see Gan." The person replies. "Nobody sees the Gan, not nobody not nohow!" before being shot in the face by Roland. The panels close and the door returns to normal. Roland opens the door again to find an exact reflection of himself! But wait, we see something familiar in this Roland, yes, it's not Roland, but Lucille Ball dressed in Roland's clothing! But Roland doesn't know this, and stares at the reflection, perplexed. He moves his hand. Lucy moves her hand. He kneels down. She kneels down. He gets back up. She gets back up. He takes out his gun. She jumps and runs away, the door slams shut and Roland opens it again to find....Vannay, dressed in futuristic clothing.
"Vannay?"
"Yes, Roland, it's me, and something's happening in the future!"
"What? Does something happen to me?"
"No, it's your kids, Roland, it's your kids! Quick, come with me!"
"Well, alright...."
Roland steps through the door, and it slams shut, an orange flash is seen from behind it, and...
TO BE CONTINUED

That's my ending. I think it's cool, though I get the feeling that someone probably already used the Back to the Future thing on this thread. It will only be continued if you want it to be.

KaLikeAWheel
09-06-2008, 03:58 AM
:rofl: You people have some of the most twisted imaginations I've ever seen!

Roland opens the door at the top of the tower, only to find Paris Hilton standing there. She looks at him seductively and says, "Gusnlingers are so hot." Roland immediately turns, goes down the stairs and walks away from the tower vowing that the next time the universe needs saving it's just shit outta luck. :nope:

Donna

Sorox the Gunslinger
09-06-2008, 07:37 AM
HAHAHA! Noone likes paris Hilton!

As Roland turns the doorknob, His hand is electrified and jake, susannah, and eddie pop and say "SURPRISE! HAPPY BURTHDAY ROLAND!" And they all die of lung cancer and AIDS.

JQ The Gunslinger
09-06-2008, 08:00 AM
Roland opens the door and comes out in a hallway, where he sees the Scooby Doo gang being chased by a monster. He gets caught up in the chase and ends up going through all kinds of different doors. He eventually realizes that the chase is an endless loop and wonders what the heck just happened and goes back out the original door. He tries to open it again but it doesn't budge. He knocks on it and a panel near the top of the door is pushed out a bit and slid open to reveal a pair of beady eyes looking out at him. The person behind the door says "Who are you?"
Roland says "I'm Roland, and I'm here to see Gan." The person replies. "Nobody sees the Gan, not nobody not nohow!" before being shot in the face by Roland. The panels close and the door returns to normal. Roland opens the door again to find an exact reflection of himself! But wait, we see something familiar in this Roland, yes, it's not Roland, but Lucille Ball dressed in Roland's clothing! But Roland doesn't know this, and stares at the reflection, perplexed. He moves his hand. Lucy moves her hand. He kneels down. She kneels down. He gets back up. She gets back up. He takes out his gun. She jumps and runs away, the door slams shut and Roland opens it again to find....Vannay, dressed in futuristic clothing.
"Vannay?"
"Yes, Roland, it's me, and something's happening in the future!"
"What? Does something happen to me?"
"No, it's your kids, Roland, it's your kids! Quick, come with me!"
"Well, alright...."
Roland steps through the door, and it slams shut, an orange flash is seen from behind it, and...
TO BE CONTINUED

That's my ending. I think it's cool, though I get the feeling that someone probably already used the Back to the Future thing on this thread. It will only be continued if you want it to be.

Hahah i love Back to The Future!!

Letti
09-06-2008, 12:14 PM
Roland opens the door and comes out in a hallway, where he sees the Scooby Doo gang being chased by a monster. He gets caught up in the chase and ends up going through all kinds of different doors. He eventually realizes that the chase is an endless loop and wonders what the heck just happened and goes back out the original door. He tries to open it again but it doesn't budge. He knocks on it and a panel near the top of the door is pushed out a bit and slid open to reveal a pair of beady eyes looking out at him. The person behind the door says "Who are you?"
Roland says "I'm Roland, and I'm here to see Gan." The person replies. "Nobody sees the Gan, not nobody not nohow!" before being shot in the face by Roland. The panels close and the door returns to normal. Roland opens the door again to find an exact reflection of himself! But wait, we see something familiar in this Roland, yes, it's not Roland, but Lucille Ball dressed in Roland's clothing! But Roland doesn't know this, and stares at the reflection, perplexed. He moves his hand. Lucy moves her hand. He kneels down. She kneels down. He gets back up. She gets back up. He takes out his gun. She jumps and runs away, the door slams shut and Roland opens it again to find....Vannay, dressed in futuristic clothing.
"Vannay?"
"Yes, Roland, it's me, and something's happening in the future!"
"What? Does something happen to me?"
"No, it's your kids, Roland, it's your kids! Quick, come with me!"
"Well, alright...."
Roland steps through the door, and it slams shut, an orange flash is seen from behind it, and...
TO BE CONTINUED

That's my ending. I think it's cool, though I get the feeling that someone probably already used the Back to the Future thing on this thread. It will only be continued if you want it to be.

:wtf:
It was excellent.
Don't continue it. It's perfect this way.

The Lady of Shadows
09-06-2008, 01:23 PM
:rofl: You people have some of the most twisted imaginations I've ever seen!

Roland opens the door at the top of the tower, only to find Paris Hilton standing there. She looks at him seductively and says, "Gusnlingers are so hot." Roland immediately turns, goes down the stairs and walks away from the tower vowing that the next time the universe needs saving it's just shit outta luck. :nope:

Donna

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk95/turtlesong/smilies/coffee_spray-1.gif

LadyHitchhiker
09-11-2008, 03:12 PM
Sorox, are you sure they're not going to die from captain trips?

Brice
09-14-2008, 01:41 PM
Roland's loop tightens. He enters the room at the top of the tower and finds himself in a field of roses, he climbs the tower, enters, the room, ends up outside at the base of the tower ad infinitum.

LadyHitchhiker
09-16-2008, 02:30 PM
Roland opens the door and ends up on the set of this fabulous show:

YouTube - the muppets show intro

Jackie
09-16-2008, 07:18 PM
Roland opens the door, and enters the Matrix

[I don't even know :lol:]

Jackie
09-16-2008, 07:37 PM
Roland opens the tower and sees a bright white light. The next thing he knows he's lying in a hospital bed with an iv in his arm. He smells the sweet aroma or roses that are on the stand beside him that Susannnah replaced daily.He opens his eyes to see his friends and family standing around him. Eddie, his brother, Susannah Eddies wife, Jake, their son, Father Callahan, his grandfather, and Oy, a cross between a dog and a wolf. He asks where he is and they tell him of the terrible accident on the Monorail he took to his job at tower productions every day,that had put him in a coma for the past three months.

Jackie
09-16-2008, 07:45 PM
[ok my third post in a row, im probably breaking some rule or something if i am im sorry and if im not im sure there are going to be some people who want to kill me anyway.....but i just COULDN'T resist]


Roland gets to the top of the tower, opens the door and........http://rickastleypwns.ytmnd.com/

razz
09-18-2008, 03:08 PM
:wtf:

Jackie
09-18-2008, 08:33 PM
Yea i think the last one was my favorite....

Roland gets Rick Rolled :lol:

LadyHitchhiker
09-19-2008, 04:05 AM
Roland opens the tower and sees a bright white light. The next thing he knows he's lying in a hospital bed with an iv in his arm. He smells the sweet aroma or roses that are on the stand beside him that Susannnah replaced daily.He opens his eyes to see his friends and family standing around him. Eddie, his brother, Susannah Eddies wife, Jake, their son, Father Callahan, his grandfather, and Oy, a cross between a dog and a wolf. He asks where he is and they tell him of the terrible accident on the Monorail he took to his job at tower productions every day,that had put him in a coma for the past three months.

I loved this...

Sol
09-19-2008, 04:10 AM
How about this?

Roland gets to the top of the tower where he sees a parachute. He then has to base jump off the top of the tower. If he pulls the rip cord, he starts to loop over again. If he doesn't, it stops.

Letti
09-19-2008, 04:15 AM
Roland opens the door aaand... there is another door behind it. He opens the new door again and he finds another door behind it again. It looks the same way as the two previous ones. Roland starts to feel confused... but he is sure - he feels it deep inside - he has reached the last door.
So he opens it again with his trembling scared hand.. aaaaaand finds a brand new door behind it.
And another one.
And another one..
And another one...
Roland keeps opening the doors until he falls down dead.

LadyHitchhiker
09-19-2008, 04:36 AM
LMAO That's great Letti!!!!!!!!!

Letti
09-19-2008, 04:42 AM
horrible, isn't it :)

Jean
09-19-2008, 04:44 AM
::inspired by my recent experience with that fish can::

Roland tries to open the door, but the handle comes off and stays in his hand.

(the rest is known to all unsuccessful can-openers. Strictly PG.)

Letti
09-19-2008, 04:48 AM
::inspired by my recent experience with that fish can::

Roland tries to open the door, but the handle comes off and stays in his hand.

(the rest is known to all unsuccessful can-openers. Strictly PG.)

OMG! This is the best I mean the worst so far!!! Oh my... I can see it so easily on my mind.
*can't stop laughing*

ManOfWesternesse
09-19-2008, 04:58 AM
Actually, that is very good Jean! :lol:
You can just picture him standing there.... looking at the handle in his hand......looking at the (now permanently closed) door......... looking at the handle in his hand.........

LadyHitchhiker
09-19-2008, 04:59 AM
Are you having a problem with can openers too, Jean? I thought maybe they were just making cans cheaper over the pond, and that's why I keep going through so many can openers!!!

Letti
09-19-2008, 05:00 AM
Actually, that is very good Jean! :lol:
You can just picture him standing there.... looking at the handle in his hand......looking at the (now permanently closed) door......... looking at the handle in his hand.........

And what can he be thinking about???? :lol:

ManOfWesternesse
09-19-2008, 05:12 AM
Actually, that is very good Jean! :lol:
You can just picture him standing there.... looking at the handle in his hand......looking at the (now permanently closed) door......... looking at the handle in his hand.........

And what can he be thinking about???? :lol:

Going back downstairs and getting his gun and shooting himself!

LadyHitchhiker
09-19-2008, 05:19 AM
Or shooting the door open... now there's a picture... :D

Rather than :pullhair: he'd come in with guns blazing and try to destroy that door!!!! LOL

LadyHitchhiker
09-19-2008, 05:26 AM
Roland walks to the door, opens it, and there is a llama. The llama spits on him and tells him to get his own room.

The Lady of Shadows
09-19-2008, 07:32 PM
Roland walks to the door, opens it, and there is a llama. The llama spits on him and tells him to get his own room.

fucking llama's. they've got such bad attitudes. i would never spit on roland. throw my drink in his face maybe. . . but spit on him? never in life.

:wtf:

Jackie
09-19-2008, 08:02 PM
Roland opens the door aaand... there is another door behind it. He opens the new door again and he finds another door behind it again. It looks the same way as the two previous ones. Roland starts to feel confused... but he is sure - he feels it deep inside - he has reached the last door.
So he opens it again with his trembling scared hand.. aaaaaand finds a brand new door behind it.
And another one.
And another one..
And another one...
Roland keeps opening the doors until he falls down dead.

:rofl:Thats great



Originally Posted by Jean
::inspired by my recent experience with that fish can::

Roland tries to open the door, but the handle comes off and stays in his hand.

(the rest is known to all unsuccessful can-openers. Strictly PG.)

That one's really good too, nice job Jean :clap:

Adumbros
09-20-2008, 09:05 AM
worst ending ever...how's about this one...

The gunslinger fled across the desert, and the man in black followed.

Adumbros
09-20-2008, 09:26 AM
better yet...

Roland gets to the top, opens the door, and encounters...

Robert Browning.

"who the fuck are you?" sez Rol.
RB proceeds to inform Roland that he is nothing more than a component of complementary parts, being created by he, Browning, and fantasized by King.
"you mean he fucking LIED to me?" Roland cries. "He didn't make me? What the hell-?"
RB tells him he is a conglomerate of his, Browning's, character; Clint Eastwood, Travis McGee, and King's own childish visual fantasy of himself.

upon which, he slams the door in Roland's face, leaving him in an echoing torpor mausoleum reverberating with Hole's "Doll Parts."

razz
09-20-2008, 01:26 PM
Roland opens the door, and...
http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/thumb/d/db/300px-Sg1stargatefront.jpg
"We have an unauthorized off world activation! Should we Lock it down?"

LadyHitchhiker
09-21-2008, 05:39 AM
razz you kill me!!!!!!!! LOL

The Lady of Shadows
10-09-2008, 06:32 PM
Option #1 -

roland opens the door and recognizing true evil, he immediately shoots to kill:

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk95/turtlesong/barneythedinosaur.jpg




Option #2 -

roland opens the door and being unsure about what the fuck he is facing goes completely insane, runs down all the steps, and spends the rest of his life dancing naked in the roses.

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk95/turtlesong/Teletubbies2.jpg